So I'm a 34M, dated (and still do) alot but decided to remain single most of my life. I'm also quite "fresh off the boat" you might say, now living in the states so I can pursue the dream.

That dream includes choosing a woman, falling in love, starting a family. I'm in Tech, I work hard and bring in way above middle income/year. I plan on buying and owning a home, other properties, etc in the next few years.

Now here is the issue that's been bothering me. Say I meet a woman soon, we hit it off, take it to the next level, get married down the road, she moves into my house, we have a child or two. Then she wakes up one day and she nolonger loves me or catches me looking at another girl, or whatever that warrants her asking for a divorce. Lawyers get hired, court it is.

I have realized society around here, the courts, law enforcement, etc are designed in her favor. If she hires a good lawyer, she could literally kick me out of my own house, claim part of my income as child care, spend it on whatever she likes and call the shots on how often I can see my kids.

How is this fair in all ways? Even if i cheated or did something worse, how does she get to take my possessions? I understand she could have contributed as my spouse, offered support, so forth. But how about what I made before we met? She couldn't have contributed to that, obviously but it would be factored in when we are splitting.

We would both be parents, raising our children together, sharing responsibilities but at the time of separation, every party involved seems to overlook that. All of a sudden, I'm a man and can't be trusted with my own kids, even if I made half a million a year working from home and can afford to hire house help.

How do I avoid this scenario? I don't want someone ripping me off, taking me back to square one all in the name of love.

If I made wrong assumptions about any of the above, feel free to educate me.