33M soon to be 34. Divorced in Oct 2022, Separated Oct 2021. Wife realized she was gay after 8 years married 13 together. 50/50 custody of a 4M.

That’s my story. Before I found this sub and the golden advice in it, I tried dating thinking it was what I was “supposed to do.” Surprise, surprise it was a dumpster fire… lesson learned…

I’ve been working on myself for 3 months now and I feel good. I’m studying German, hanging out with 20s / 30s groups, working on all the DIY projects I never had time for, spending time being a damn good Dad, quit drinking, consistently working out, and trying to slow down and enjoy life.

But I’ve run out of money with all the divorce payments, my own validation leaves me wanting, my friends are all settled and I feel rifts growing despite their amazing attempts at support, the groups I find myself in are all younger and dating, the winter is cold and dark, and I find myself just a bit “older, worn out, and lost.”

Dismissing thoughts and positive self talk are strong - so far I’m succeeding at being a stone cold stud and it does get me unneeded attention, but they only take me so far. Any advice? I feel like I’m plateauing…

TLDR; Divorced after a year separation and struggling to focus on self improvement and being at peace as the moments tick by… seeking advice/ support