UK: Domestic abuse charity loses £5M in funding because it is not gender-neutral: Brighton council chiefs said an equality assessment found more support was needed for straight, gay and trans men — and Rise is mostly a women-only service.

wayne2000 · 2021-03-01T13:45:04+00:00

Refuge is the site which says in the mens section.

"You may be visiting this site because you are, or think you might be, experiencing domestic violence"

And

"You may also be visiting this site because you think you may be an abuser"

No language using "think" or about being an abuser on the women's section.

feluto · 2021-03-01T12:33:25+00:00

I don't understand what kind of monster would refuse to help someone in an abusive situation purely because of gender

Its twice as confusing to realise that they without a doubt had this issue come up and chose to do nothing about it time and time again, instead of making sure everyone has a safe way out they'd rather only protect women even if it costs 5 million pounds. Clown world!

simpleaussieguy · 2021-03-01T14:12:21+00:00

The last 10 years of my marriage was abusive, there was no services I could use or places to go. Ringing the domestic violence numbers was a joke "just try not to make her angry" or "we know your the one being abusive" was the most common reply. If it was not for my boss going above and beyond for me I would not be here, I had the spot picked out and wrote so many letters saying goodbye. And for those who wonder why as a man I could not just leave, She threatened to call the cops and tell them I was beating her and would make sure I never saw my kids again if I tried to leave.

i_accidently_reddit · 2021-03-01T14:13:37+00:00

Almost every domestic abuse charity is almost exclusively focussed on women. Only females can be victims, men can only be perpetrators.

Oh your wife stabbed you with a knife? You must have threatened her and she was just defending herself.

Oh she shot and killed you? What crazy evil and twisted bastard you must have been to drive into this action of despair.

That's how this works. It's disgusting and sexist and wrong. But that is reality.

Mycroft033 · 2021-03-01T15:24:58+00:00

Ohhhhh this article was a frustrating read. The comments below it are even worse.

91% of domestic abuse victims are women, studies have shown.

Having their interviewees talking about how the women might lose out on domestic abuse help, rather than the fact that men have been losing out on it for centuries.

They didn’t even cite their study they said showed that women were the victims. There are lots of studies out there that show pretty clearly that when you account for the stigma around male victims, when you account for the fact that the legal definition of DV is inherently skewed to make women be the only victims, and when you account for the fact that men are told to suffer in silence, you actually find that men are abused by women almost completely as much as women are abused by men. Frequently this takes the form of psychological and emotional abuse. Physical abuse is often a factor too because that bullshit about “who is stronger, you or her?” changes when she has a knife. Like what the actual flying fuck? This article didn’t even try to appear unbiased.

Now I hope that Rise gets its act together and starts realizing men need help too because while it’s good that they are being held accountable, it’s not good for anyone to lose out on DV help. Men must be added to the system, but it shouldn’t be at the expense of women. And yet, losing funding is probably the only way you can get the attention of a corrupt gynocentric organization like Rise.

Tough decisions man.

TomClaydon · 2021-03-01T14:38:12+00:00

Lol of course it is. Honestly people don’t understand how often this happens with guys. We just don’t often report it or tell anyone out of fear of being shamed or laughed at or not taken seriously. Obviously that’s not exclusive to straight dudes but it is a serious problem. Most people think oh you’re a man you’re fine, it’s nothing. Meanwhile your partner is beating the shit out of you with any object she can see because she’s gotten irrationally angry over something. I’m projecting but this gets to me a lot having experienced it

im-not-a-bot-im-real · 2021-03-01T13:33:45+00:00

Hey they get what they wanted

OrkenOgle · 2021-03-01T14:30:07+00:00

What is their problem? Just Help all victims of domestic abuse.

throwawayham1971 · 2021-03-01T14:45:11+00:00

Wait. Hold on.

When WE say equality, equity or whatever new buzzword we promote... what WE REALLY MEAN is that we get AT LEAST 50% OF EVERYTHING.

And this is regardless qualifications and/or logic.

Lastly, there's NO LIMIT to how much ABOVE 50% we can get. Because when that happens, then we somehow turn into free-market rough riders who believe in unbridled competition.

2021-03-01T16:11:01+00:00

Far more men are victims of domestic and sexual abuse than society has historically wanted to admit. Based on my personal subjective experience, it seems like the numbers are pretty equal. Men are either ignored when they talk about or choose not to report for various reasons.

throwaway9732121 · 2021-03-01T12:29:30+00:00

This is pussypassdenied brainlets. Just because it doesn't feature a highschool fight, doesn't mean its not pussypassdenied.

TypicalNPC · 2021-03-01T09:42:10+00:00

While this isn't pussy pass denied this is great news.

Now multiple parties can gain help rather than only focusing on one group of people for having a hole

Levoxymoron · 2021-03-01T20:34:21+00:00

I tried contacting them for help when I first moved to Brighton. I just got away from an abusive relationship and was dealing with some severe PTSD as a result.

After reaching out to FIVE different organisations that claimed to offer support, I was put on the "urgent need" waiting lists.

It's been 2 and a half years since and I haven't heard a peep from any of them. Thankfully I met a great group of people through the 'meetup' app that helped me get through the worst of it. I don't think I'd even be here today if it weren't for them.

Charliem1994 · 2021-03-01T13:43:28+00:00

You reap what you sow, feminists

Professor-Wheatbox · 2021-03-01T22:59:28+00:00

Nobody cares about men, especially not women

2021-03-01T17:58:44+00:00

Nice to see a council dispensing some true equality for a change.

vcjdeathrow · 2021-03-01T19:04:00+00:00

I used to work in law enforcement. Can't tell you how many times I saw a couple get brought in for domestic and the dude would be beat to shit, but the woman didn't have a mark on her. They'd still arrest the dude based on her word. The women were usually released before the men.

After I left law enforcement, I went to work for a non-profit for victims of domestic abuse. Occasionally, we'd get male victims, but more often than not, they'd decline to pursue anything.

Everything was fine until after about a year, we got a new boss. The new unwritten policy was all men were guilty. I would always try to be the voice of reason and state that guilt can't be assumed. Suddenly all the reports dried up and I was let go due to "insufficient work". Turns out the new boss was tanking reports just to get rid of me. They posted my job online not long after.

DogMechanic · 2021-03-01T17:34:44+00:00

Equality doesn't mean improvement for all. It means regressing everything until everyone is screwed the same.

lordpuffynips · 2021-03-01T20:03:54+00:00

Ah yes, if it isn't the circular firing squad that is the left...

neodymium1337 · 2021-03-01T16:16:07+00:00

You reap what you sow. You get what you deserve. You made your own bed and must now lie in it.

polerize · 2021-03-01T17:23:30+00:00

great, this should happen more often. Far too many women only services.

thelordflashheart99 · 2021-03-01T13:49:32+00:00

/r/leopardsatemyface

Bladeslinger2 · 2021-03-01T13:10:45+00:00

Keep letting the left dictate policy. You reap what you sow.

PeopleRtheproblem · 2021-03-03T13:48:10+00:00

Run by women for women...and now paid for by women

The-truth-hurts1 · 2021-03-01T15:30:37+00:00

I’m sure there are many things that one sex suffers more than the other, that doesn’t give you the right to ignore the smaller percentage of whatever sex that suffers it.. if ten people are injured, nine of them are women and one man, you treat them all.. not just the one sex.. crazy world

timleykis101 · 2021-03-01T16:56:05+00:00

GOOD!

galacticpotat · 2021-03-01T21:45:34+00:00

Aren't they also punishing the victims? I mean It's not their fault the organization decided to be selfish pricks

Irishman042 · 2021-03-01T14:20:07+00:00

[permanently deleted]

Mojave_Trooper · 2021-03-01T22:48:10+00:00

This is shit.

With that said, we warned feminists that the leftist wave theyre riding won't end with them. They ignored those warnings. And now it's victims who are paying the price.

Good job, feminists! /s

AdikaHUN0328 · 2021-03-01T10:48:00+00:00

How the fuck is this pussy pass denied? I mean, the sub is for mocking entitled women who use their gender and feminism to their gain. Good news, we are moving towards equality tho, but not pussy pass denied.

ntvirtue · 2021-03-01T17:31:36+00:00

Lovely they are eating their own!

permaBack · 2021-03-01T18:22:15+00:00

Wellcome to the left and Antifa world

the_pupilwx · 2021-03-01T09:30:59+00:00

r/UpliftingNews not r/pussypassdenied imho.

but there is no pussypass here... Part of me is sad because there are probably women who did benegir from that charity and now might have less... But I don't know that so I won't go there.

It's good that we are moving to a more progressive world <3

corf3l · 2021-03-01T13:28:44+00:00

I disagree with this in principal as it's not really a victory to anyone.
Lots of victims are now going to suffer for this
However I was interested by this

Studies have found 91 per cent of domestic abuse is against women, who are much more likely to be seriously hurt or killed than male victims.

Women also typically experience higher rates of repeated victimisation and are much more likely to be seriously hurt or killed than male victims of domestic abuse, with 83% of domestic abuse victims who are subjected to more than 10 violent incidents being women.

I wonder how skewed those statistics are due to the fact there are a lot less outlets for men to seek help, there is still a stigma attached to men coming forward and allegations of female abuse towards males are often easily dismissed or ignored.

Tie that in with male suicide rate being exceptionally higher than women you might see some correlation

iiinsan_e_ · 2021-03-01T19:51:54+00:00

Im really sorry if im being stupid but are we celebrating a charity to stop abuse losing funding? again i might have misread the whole situation but if not, i thought this sub is about women who feel they are entitled to any and every thing they see, not abuse victims, thats really fucked up guys

Banequo · 2021-03-01T17:15:30+00:00

Leftism just destroys everything. It’s the new Anarchy.

Jalsavrah · 2021-03-01T16:52:44+00:00

This is really sad.

puntgreta89 · 2021-03-01T14:09:23+00:00

LOL!

Dad-man · 2021-03-01T21:18:16+00:00

I can't agree with this one. Some things need to be gender segregated, and this is one. My mother used a similar service, and i wasn't allowed into her crisis residence because it was used by other women that MAY have issues being around men. I get that, and was cool with it. The power difference between men and women can be huge. I understand men require these services too, but think they should have gender segregated services for them.

In Australia about once a week a woman dies at the hands of their partner. If we lost one person a week to terrorists, there would be massive outcry. This is not a pussypass, this is a greatly needed service.

frakramsey · 2021-03-01T15:40:20+00:00

I'm not sure this belongs here

Ace_Rips · 2021-03-01T19:21:03+00:00

Yurishirox · 2021-03-01T17:30:49+00:00

Thats aweful. Women that got beat and then sought out help is in no ways PPD material. Some woke POS would rather they didnt get help. And if that wasnt the idea, its the obvious effect.

feluto · 2021-03-01T12:25:33+00:00

[permanently deleted]

SillyOldBillyBob · 2021-03-01T12:51:15+00:00

I totally disagree with this actually. They need to have the services for men definitely but women need it also. Taking away funding from a service that helps women only is as fucked up as taking it away from a service that helps men only.

Ipride362 · 2021-03-01T13:28:34+00:00

This shit is so stale

chunkydan · 2021-03-01T12:49:23+00:00

[permanently deleted]

gws · 2021-03-01T16:39:30+00:00

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3tTUREalxVQ

Getmetothebaboon · 2021-03-02T04:54:14+00:00

Whoops! Fuck the bastards.

OpenShut · 2021-03-02T10:38:57+00:00

Studies have found 91 per cent of domestic abuse is against women, who are much more likely to be seriously hurt or killed than male victims.

They do not reference this study but according to the ONS (official of national statistic and the best source for data) the split is more 65%.

BIN3RY · 2021-03-02T12:51:09+00:00

Strange they don't have a gender equality pay breakdown of the charity on the website.

sithlord_crisps · 2021-03-02T19:44:26+00:00

How does this apply to this sub specifically? How is loss of funding a good thing?

purplepluppy · 2021-03-03T04:52:26+00:00

If I'm being honest, I see no problem with having women-specific services for domestic abuse. Instead of punishing those organizations, they should put funding into men-specific services as well.

Just my thoughts on the matter.

Edit: I see now that the funding was meant for just that, and they failed to live up to the requirements. So nevermind! Hopefully they can find another organization that can succeed in finding ways to help men in abusive situations.

Guy_In_TheChair · 2021-10-27T17:00:25+00:00

This article contains an outright lie that 91% of domestic abuse is against women. In the UK 40% of victims of domestic abuse are men, most at the hands of a female abuser.

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