I am 25 male and going through a breakup. I turn to this sub because idk who else to talk to. Most of you folks understand my situation and could probably give me some wisdom and advice.

Long story short, my ex disclosed (after some probing on my part, not from the goodness of her heart lol) that she had “inactive” dating accounts even though she told me she had deleted them (she had lied).

She knew long ago that I would have been uncomfortable with that, because I told her I can’t be with a girl who keeps her options open. I knew about monkey branching and wanted to prevent that. I was always loyal myself and had deleted my own tinder and bumble accounts. After I found out, I blew up at her and said some mean things. I didn’t curse or use swear words, but I basically said she wasn’t fit to be a girlfriend nor wife. I walked out the room. We broke up two days later.

I lost a friend group in the process, including her roommate who herself went through a breakup recently. I know how women work and the crabs in a bucket mentality, the whole “you deserve better” especially when they’re single. I know my ex is easily influenced by others so that’s likely what happened. Her roommate now hates me (we were friends for 5 years before this) due to the breakup. She doesn’t even know the whole story, she just sided with her friend.

I tried being friends with both my ex and her roommate and I tried communicating with both so that we could remain on good terms but they both wouldn’t have it. They were both okay with burning the bridge with me entirely. It’s disheartening because I did everything for this girl, and in the end she’s the one who duped me. I believe I had the right to be angry in the end. I kinda feel like I am being treated as less than human.

Admittedly, I think her roommate cut me off because my ex stopped eating at the end of the relationship. She was very stressed and I did not know the cause of it. I tried probing and asking why, she stonewalled as usual. She expected me to guess how she felt all the time, and I honestly had no idea how my ex felt most of the time. Now I am being demonized for it. I am not a mind reader.

How do I deal with the loss of this friend, my ex, and possibly the whole mutual friend group associated with them? They’ve probably talked to much shit about me after this incident and I’m embarrassed, even though I don’t believe I did anything wrong. I always acted with integrity and was always honest.