How do you know when you are in love with someone?

ivysaurah · 2023-06-11T17:06:56+00:00

There were a few things with my husband. I could lay in his arms forever and never get bored. I loved the way he smelled even if he hadn’t showered yet that day. I went through my work shifts in the best mood knowing I could go and see him when I got off.

With time, the puppy love comes and goes, but eventually I realized I could see him being the father of my children. I could see how our values meshed so well together. And one day I realized that he felt like home to me. We got engaged soon after, married after that, and 5 years later, I don’t get attached to the space we’re living in at the time really. I still feel like he’s my home wherever we are.

To this day, we both put an effort in to keep the romantic love alive. It doesn’t die, it just starts to require effort from both parties. When you love someone, that effort doesn’t feel like a chore.

diaryofalostgirl · 2023-06-11T21:38:58+00:00

Every time I've felt love, the kind of love that could have been (and, once, was) something, I remember the moment I met him, the moment the trajectory of my life changed. I've hurt for and with them, I've despaired over their mistakes and rejoiced in their triumphs. Unlike with most men, I felt safe enough to imagine giving my body to them. In the years to come, after I lost them to time or circumstance, I have met them in my dreams and it felt like two paths crossing where reality is suspended for a little while -- but very real, for all that, as if they could be dreaming the same thing across town.

All of them became more important than I was. All of them were men I could give my respect and trust to, even if I had to withdraw it when it was abused. Even if I was a confused child when I was feeling these things, I was still feeling them, and while love lasted never felt more feminine than I did around them.

But that's only one way to love. That's only how I love. What are you experiencing?

anothergoodbook · 2023-06-11T16:22:36+00:00

I knew I was fully in love with my husband (and knew I wanted to marry) was we were long distance over Christmas and I realized I never wanted to miss a Christmas with him again.

The feeling of romantic love, however, is fleeting. The important things we valued overlapped. While we were both head over heels for each other we also knew what we wanted and made sure we aligned on those things.

Being married for 17 years and having rough patches means that yes I’ve looked at other people and thought “what would that be like” so saying that it’s love because you don’t have an interest in other people isn’t exactly accurate.

It’s also a matter of looking at someone and thinking “I want to do things for this person that makes them happier and their life easier” another way I knew I loved my husband was he inspired me to be the best version of myself (which he encouraged as well).

flower_power_g1rl · 2023-06-11T18:47:18+00:00

As a person who has been in love thrice, I can elaborate.

The first time, you think they're perfect for you, no matter what your friends say. They were not what you expected or dreamed of in a partner, but you find yourself so willing to change your original route so as to keep you and them together. This is because they give you things you cannot give yourself. You find yourself asking, "How do I know if this person is right for me?"

The second time, you fall in true love. You know it is true love, because it is much deeper and probably longer-lasting than the first time. This person fights hard to keep you two together. You are forever changed, because the connection with this person is the most natural and strong connection you have ever experienced. You feel 'a pair.' You feel they are part of your identity. They are the best, so far. You do not want to lose what you have. At one point, you realize this is who you are going to be with forever. Therefore, as long as you don't do anything, it's okay that your mind still wanders. This person is yours, you are theirs. They are the best you can realistically have. Therefore, it's harmless to fantasize about being with others. Right? Is it? You google on incognito, "Is imagining relationships with others a sign that I am trying to run away?"

The third time, you are angry with yourself. You already promised all your friends that the second love was the only one who can ever understand you. You told your family that he is the height of love, and you can never have it again. The third time, you are going through a complete metamorphosis. You are a mess. You are the goo in the chrysalis, except you can't see the chrysalis; you just think yourself messy as goo. This third person has a very forgettable face or voice. They are somebody you never think of. They are a background character in your life. Until, one day they see a bit of your goo-iness. They offer their input. You are offended. At this point, you know who you are. You know how to stick up for yourself.
Time goes by, and you don't even know how it happened. This nobody, this forgettable face, has become the one who has touched your soul deepest and left burn marks like a hot coal. They saw all the most disgusting parts of yourself , the goo you have been hiding with much vigor, and they let you be YOU. You love them for this.
Sex is indescribable. Any previous sexual experience you have feels like a tickle compared to what this person does. Any previous love feels like shallow waters, whereas your love for this person is the ocean itself. The thought of separation brings a bitter taste to your mouth, but not fear. You find yourself wholly believing in your ability to face pain, arguments, and separations. This third one is a mirror who SHOWS YOU TO YOUR FACE YOUR EVERY COURAGE, especially when you are at your most weak. This person is like a brother. Their words hurt you when they argue, yes, but nothing they do or say could hurt you more than their passing away. You can cry just thinking of them. In fact, if you are in love, you may be crying reading this now.

Time goes by, and you learn that you were never in love with the first nor the second person. But only upon loving this third person, you will know that. Once you love this third person, you will not ask anymore "How do you know when you are in love?".

angelicasinensis · 2023-06-11T19:58:25+00:00

You don’t need to ask on Reddit, lol, just kidding but forreal, when you know you KNOW.

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jenna_grows · 2023-06-12T10:26:47+00:00

I just want more for him than I even want for myself.

If I’m happy? I hope he’s happier. If I’m successful? I hope he’s more successful. If I’m peaceful? I hope he’s more peaceful.

So it’s not that I don’t want these things for me, it’s just that I want what I want plus even more because - as happy as I am with what I have - I would give him the earth if I could.

And he’s the same about me.

aslanhatessmeagol · 2023-06-12T11:54:51+00:00

When that person is not around, you feel incomplete. You crave for his/her presence.

Maree70 · 2023-06-11T16:00:34+00:00

[permanently deleted]

Title	How do you know when you are in love with someone?
Author	Maree70
Upvotes	16
Comments	14
Date	June 11, 2023 3:59 PM UTC (3 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/RedPillWomen
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/RedPillWomen/comments/146xjsh/how_do_you_know_when_you_are_in_love_with_someone/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/RedPillWomen/how-do-you-know-when-you-are-in-love-with-someone.1221916 https://theredarchive.com/post/1221916

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