What is considered to be an ulterior motive?

63daddy · 2023-06-17T19:45:05+00:00

From the Collins dictionary:

“if you say that someone has an ulterior motive for doing something, you believe that they have a hidden reason for doing it”

A woman says she likes a guy for his personality, but in reality is attracted to his wealth. A guy pretends he likes a certain girl, but in reality is only being kind to her as a means of getting closer to a friend of hers, etc.

Safinated · 2023-06-17T20:14:09+00:00

Omitting or lying about it, obviously

eefr · 2023-06-17T19:25:41+00:00

Motives are ulterior if they are hidden.

Wanting sex is a reasonable motive; it is only ulterior if you are pretending otherwise.

houstongradengineer · 2023-06-17T20:16:53+00:00

Screw society.

The only kind of hidden motive that matters is the kind that leads to a violation of individual mutual agreements and decency. Once you violate someone's personal trust, there is no coming back. If there wasn't a violation, there would probably be little reason to hide your feelings/motives from your teammate. What you tell society, on the other hand, doesn't matter. And what society approves often also matters very little in the US.

You can theoretically enjoy someone's wealth without violating their sense of decency or their trust. You can also enjoy someone's body in the same way. But why hide your motives? It usually just causes extra effort, drama, and headache. I personally don't do that type of thing, except maybe for my career I'll have to put on a silly show.

Unnecessary-Training · 2023-06-17T21:12:34+00:00

The problem with nice guys is that they're cowards. They don't have the courage to confess their feelings. They don't have the courage to say no when they're asked for favors. Instead, they just keep seething within their own minds and type out angry screeds on Reddit.

Nobody likes cowards.

KnightsWhoPlayWii · 2023-06-18T00:20:19+00:00

The man I thought was my best friend turned out to actually be a “nice guy.” He claimed that he wasn’t ready to “get back out there again” yet, either (I had just been through a bad breakup, and I really wasn’t ready to date). He later admitted (when he friend dumped me) that he had been trying to “Trojan horse” his way into a relationship with me - he basically acted like my boyfriend in all but name, and assumed that by the time I was ready, he’d be the obvious choice. I trusted him, and was absolutely devastated when the truth came out.

His ulterior motives sucked.

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Snoo16680 · 2023-06-18T08:05:13+00:00

There is a world of nuance in this, its basic human interaction. When we say "ulterior motive" we think of Lies and deception outside the norm of what is ok.

On top of that we have this ugly appetite to shame imperfect men over sex. As if it is a sin for a thirsty man to consider opportunities with friends.

Title	What is considered to be an ulterior motive?
Author	John_Oakman
Upvotes	14
Comments	24
Date	June 17, 2023 7:10 PM UTC (3 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/14bz28i/what_is_considered_to_be_an_ulterior_motive/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/what-is-considered-to-be-an-ulterior-motive.1222838 https://theredarchive.com/post/1222838

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