Things are definitely moving quicker than I thought they would. My (sigh) STBXW and I had another discussion this morning and she is starting to look for a place for either Jan or Feb. (She's not able to say whether she wants seperation to work on our relationship or to be able to date, which answers that question totally).

She apparently had some concerns that the spreadsheet I had shown her was 'lowballing' her spousal support, so I asked her to look at it and let me know how she thinks it could be modified, and to give me something that we could use for a start for mediation.

I made sure to tell her that if we can come to an agreement that it will cost a lot less than mediation, and a LOT less than using lawyers. I'm waiting to see what (if anything) she comes back with. I've also said that I'm not going to pay any support without an agreement in place. She also couldn't tell me whether she wants to use mediation or have a legal battle. One of the things she doesn't realize is that if it does become a legal battle, she will likely get less than I am offering - I tried to make a fair deal, that slightly favours her, hoping to get a quick agreement and saving time and money.

In the meantime, I've booked a consultation with a family law lawyer that does mediation as well for Tuesday. Oh yeah, I've been hitting the gym too - working on my running (I feel the stress falling off me after about 3 miles)