FR lame date, girl leaves early in a huff

gentlemanofleisure · 2010-10-30T22:26:25+00:00

For God's sake, yes, you did something wrong. If it's a date, you spend the time with the other person. You don't wander off by yourself down a park path and hope she follows.

And you don't "lead" on a date, either. "I'm definitely not watching this all day" and stomping off was the wrong move. Instead, you say something like, "Well, that was interesting. Are you ready to go?"

What were you going to do next? Did you even have a plan for this date?

Christ.

cheddarchexmix · 2010-10-30T22:32:15+00:00

Hugely rude, never walk away from a date like that!

Some girls just get really nervous on a first date, it's your job to make them feel comfortable.

ambi7ion · 2010-10-31T00:07:44+00:00

Pretty rude imho, if you were trying to make a good impression then who cares what you are doing as long as you are with her?

ladywonderlux · 2010-10-30T23:40:36+00:00

Possibly the most awkward thing I have ever read.

Oh_Uncle_Paul · 2010-10-30T23:01:54+00:00

Dude, who cares? She's a nervous nelly and probably an emotional wreck. You don't need that in your life. I'm 29 and recently single. I'm learning that you don't need to deal with anyone's bullshit or baggage or whatever you want to call it. Move on. Fuck all these people in here thinking you did something wrong.

JimmySlade · 2010-10-30T23:07:42+00:00

I think the mistake was taking her to a park.

It was the first date, and probably the first time seeing each other the flesh. Taking her to a high pressure environment like a park probably freaked her out. There were other couples there which would influence the 'tone' of the date; she saw them, realized the similarities and then got nervous.

I think walking off was dumb, but not the dealbreaker. You were dead in the water before that.

screwthat4u · 2010-10-31T01:20:13+00:00

I just think it was a misunderstanding. You arent a jerk, just apologize and explain things. But thats assuming you want to see her again, if it went like that I wouldnt.

IANAPUA_Yet · 2010-10-31T01:29:10+00:00

You probably should have made the transition more positive ("Well, that was interesting. Let's go to ABC now" partial hat-tip to VodkaGimlet). You also should have glanced back and asked if she was coming before you were out of sight.

But that's minor. The bottom line is that girl had hangups and you don't have to cater to them. She could have followed. She could have said, "Can we wait 10 more minutes?" Instead, she just sat there.

Forget about it.

intjpua · 2010-10-31T09:01:02+00:00

You did something wrong long before you wandered off, though I can't tell what it is here. I've never been on a date with someone that was so freaked out about being in close proximity to me. Even girls I've met online, which are often far more awkward and almost never go anywhere, the result is far more relaxed than this.

How nervous were you? This seems like it would only be possible if you have a reciprocating nervousness cycle, where she does something that shows how scared she is, you do something to overreact to it, she overreacts to your overreaction, and suddenly you're walking off and leaving the girl standing by herself, utterly baffled at what just happened.

Were you teasing? Were you having some fun with her? Making jokes? Letting her know you're human, and that she's allowed to be human, too?

Were you touching her in non-intimate ways from the first moment you met? (You can, and should, gently and with an open palm, touch the back, shoulder or upper arm, within moments of meeting a girl you're attracted to.)

Were you focusing on the world rather than on the tenuous little thread that joins you, thus far? e.g. were you having fun looking at and commenting on the things you were experiencing, or were you focused solely on her?

But, yeah, I mean I guess this girl is kinda nuts. But, I'm pretty sure you are, too. I just don't see how a date could go this bizarrely without two parties playing along.

lrocklin · 2010-11-01T05:52:27+00:00

It wasn't all your fault man, you made an error in communicating what you wanted to do and making that clear to her. But she sounded so nervous its hard to imagine she was enjoying herself at all, it wasn't going to work out. In the future try to communicate changes in activities, and meet a girl who doesn't like Bollywood film makers.

Title	FR lame date, girl leaves early in a huff
Author	gentlemanofleisure
Upvotes	5
Comments	39
Date	October 30, 2010 10:22 PM UTC (15 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/dyuqo/fr_lame_date_girl_leaves_early_in_a_huff/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/fr-lame-date-girl-leaves-early-in-a-huff.1312627 https://theredarchive.com/post/1312627

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