[Pseudo-FR] The guy that wants to fight you

myPUAname · 2010-12-30T00:05:22+00:00

from someone who has been in about 50 situations like you just described, but only 1 actual bar fight, heres what you should know:

American Males tend to do a lot of posturing, but generally will not be willing to actually throw down. Basically it is all a big bluff. Actually, I'm going to be honest, here. I'VE been that douche on a few occasions because I know that the other guy is likely to step down or try to back out of the fight and the chances that an actual fight will happen are very low. I would like to add that I am ashamed of this, and it only happens when I'm drunk as shit on whiskey (but never vodka for some reason). Anyways, just like seduction material tells you to not be intimidated by HBs, you should also not be intimidated by bullies. And yes, I realize that I just called myself a bully. They don't want to actually fight anymore than you do.

The trick to winning this kind of situation is to be completely comfortable with it. heres what I do:

look them in the eyes without blinking, speak real slow, with as big of a smile as i can manage, and, speaking slowly and confidently, ask: "are you 100 percent sure you want to do this?" The purpose here is two-fold. 1, to look like you are one crazy ass mother fucker who is actually happy that some one wants to fight him, and 2, plant the seed of doubt in their mind. Generally there will be a short period of time where you two will stare each other down. DO NOT BREAK EYE CONTACT, AND DO NOT BREAK THIS SILENCE. you should be showing as much teeth as possible in the biggest crazy smile as you can manage, while being as relaxed as possible. Think Clint Eastwood mixed with chimpanzee.

When the other guy breaks the silence (and he will, eventually), he will either apologize or say something about how it was a misunderstanding or he will reaffirm that yes, he does want to fight. If he backs down, great! you've won! if he doesn't, don't fret! now you can appeal to his rational side. in response to him, say in a calm voice: "sweet!! you hit me first. I don't want to get hit with another assault charge." this does 3 things: 1) continues to show that you are happy this fight is occurring, 2) shows that you've done this kind of thing before, and 3) brings up the legal issues involved in bar fights. The 3rd point is key: it demonstrates that you are familiar with the legal process involved with fights and therefore might sue his ass if you get your ass beat. If he doesn't back down now, then you're probably going to get in a fight. which sucks, but believe me it doesn't actually hurt that much and makes a great story. Plus you can sue the guy for assault if he hits you first! (i think. I am not a lawyer and have never actually been charged with assault or charged anyone else. Honestly I have no idea about the legal process involved with this sort of thing.)

When he does back down, (and he will) be civil about it. Don't call him names, don't get exasperated, don't get worked up. Apologize for the misunderstanding and get on with your life. If you are worried about your personal safety, tell the bouncer or bartender and they will remove the other party.

The great part about this pre-fight dialogue is that it takes a couple of minutes if you play it right and gives the other person time to calm down and look at things a bit less emotionally. Honestly, though, if you're going to try this you should be prepared to fight if you have too. This will not work 100% of the time. Also, I am not advocating anyone to go out and pick fights. This is a way to diffuse the situation while maintaining dominance.

PUAonHisWay · 2010-12-29T14:01:15+00:00

I'm seriously still angry about it, 4 or 5 hours later.

Just imagine how angry he is. The guy tried to get a rise out of you and failed. You mention how fighting is the most "biologically alpha" thing a guy can do, but ignoring him and acting aloof is the most socially alpha thing you could have done. In the context of going out and PUA dynamics, the social aspects are what matter the most. You could have gone out, fought him, and satisfied the ego of nobody but yourself. Instead, you acted cool and didn't indulge his idiocy. You did the right thing. And trust me, he is far more pissed of than you are.

emooz · 2010-12-29T10:26:52+00:00

I'm seriously not even sure why this made me so angry

Your ego and the fact that he ruined your good night.

Don't think that shit is common, it happens but that's not normal. I think the best way out of this kind of situation is to ignore it and show ppl that such primitive behavior doesn't phase you (It's hard).

cheddarchexmix · 2010-12-29T22:05:37+00:00

I find fights really break my state too, even when (as always) they don't involve me. If I'm at a bar and a fight breaks out, I just move on to the next bar.

I'm pretty sure this guy was just looking for a fight and it had nothing to do with your game or anything like that. If anything it's a sign you were doing something right because he saw you as a high-value target. I wouldn't change anything, except maybe switch bars next time.

Oh yeah: and don't get into fights with strangers for any reason, even when 100% provoked, unless you like going to jail.

chumpta · 2010-12-29T12:45:10+00:00

in regards to the whole primal/alpha thing, kicking someone's ass is technically a dhv i guess. but it's demonstrating fighting value? whatever that may be - physical toughness. you can't win points by losing a fight, you can only go down in value. but you can go down in value if you win too, perhaps if you started it out of misplaced anger.

while winning a fight is the most alpha thing many animals can do, i would not place humans, and perhaps some primates into that category (don't really know much about other primates, just guessin'). whereas a lion is only as strong as his body and his teeth, a man is as strong as his allies. this is why there is a commonly referred to DHV known as "leader of men" and not one for "kicker of men's asses."

tl;dr human/primate value is more social than physical so kicking ass isn't the most alpha thing you can do

ThrowawayPUA · 2010-12-29T13:28:04+00:00

Never let an AMOG get a rise out of you in a situation like that. I call guys like this "crossing energy fields," he's like a crosswind that can blow you off course, if you let him. Keep on you path and don't let him break your frame.

philosarapter · 2010-12-29T19:41:34+00:00

I'm the wrong person to ask about it, but I just tend to openly and loudly mock people like this in front of all his friends. "WOAH HOLD UP EVERYONE WE GOT A TOUGH GUY HERE HES GONNA TAKE ON EVERYONE"

hahaha. normally they just get incredibly embarassed or we throw down. either way, its all the more fun to me.

jamba_juice · 2010-12-29T17:40:07+00:00

This happens to me constantly! Usually i will just destroy their reason for being angry with some logical reason why they are so stupid, which makes them want to fight even more, then dismiss myself.

I've never actually had to fight anyone, but i see the rage in their eyes, and i think this more than actually fighting them boosts your social proof.

dark180 · 2010-12-29T21:12:39+00:00

This might sound really lame but every time i run into a situation like this i think about bugs bunny: Elmer fud was always trying to hunt him and what did bugs do? he kissed him, this made fud angrier. Now im not trying to say kiss the guy but just play it cool or act the complete opposite way he expects you to react. This will make him look like an idiot and you like an alpha.

Title	[Pseudo-FR] The guy that wants to fight you
Author	FacelessTwink
Upvotes	13
Comments	34
Date	December 29, 2010 9:59 AM UTC (15 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/et0rp/pseudofr_the_guy_that_wants_to_fight_you/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/pseudo-fr-the-guy-that-wants-to-fight-you.1314038 https://theredarchive.com/post/1314038

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