The room/apartment (as in, your room/apartment)

RaiseYourGlass · 2011-02-07T02:07:13+00:00

As a rule, I hide my geeky stuff until a girl knows me better. I go for a reasonably sleek, professional look, with a few hints of personality.

Something girls notice more than guys is smell. I buy the gayest looking air freshner and fabric softner (the logic being that it's probably the best). I have had many comments about how amazing my room smells.

EDIT: I keep one or 2 geeky thing one show (ie dual monitors) because most girls have never seen a mouse move from one monitor to the other and go apeshit. Joystick, so that if they ask why I have it I can show them how to fly a helicopter on flight sim... them sitting on my lap and my hand over theirs on the joystick. 50% of the time it works every time.

Karma_Be_Damned · 2011-02-07T02:15:34+00:00

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senator_mendoza · 2011-02-07T04:55:06+00:00

i couldn't disagree more with the people who say make it like "professional" or like something out of a catalog. seriously, fuck that. BE YOURSELF. and fucking own it. THAT'S attractive. do NOT feel like you need to conform to some prototypical generic bullshit in order for women to want to sleep with you. that's a recipe for lifelong unhappiness. you know what your apartment and room should look like? however the fuck YOU want them to look like. fill it with stuff that you like looking at and that makes you feel relaxed and at home.

postdarwin · 2011-02-07T02:51:02+00:00

Some random stuff:

I recommend a large comfortable shaggy rug by a large couch. If you can get their shoes off, they'll give themselves an auto-erotic foot massage.

I'm often lazy about dishes and they're uncoordinated, so I have a very nice set of mugs, bowls, plates, glasses--that I NEVER USE--on obvious display (underneath the cabinet with the regular motley collection). This is what they go for if they want a glass. They think I'm neat and classy.

I keep musical instruments around. Tibetan prayer bowl, rainstick, etc. and a bunch of other toys for drunk adults.

I keep some suggestive book titles (on healthy relationships, good sex, positive self-help, even one called "Male Dominance") on a shelf in the bathroom . Only women sitting down will notice them. During those few minutes alone where they'd normally be thinking about me, the books can condition their thinking.

On the point of the mood change, it appears you are vulnerable and touchy about your decor (fuck it, I am too sometimes). Specifically the things that you may think are clever, cool and hip. When someone turns into the school jock and says "Star Wars is gay," you shut down. Either put this stuff away and get some neutral "adult" decorations (like you see in fake rooms in a furniture catalog) or else develop a fun, confident defense mechanism for yourself. Enthusiastic passion about geeky stuff can be effective.

That being said, if the girls you're interested in are not interested (and don't even respect) your cool stuff, then something is mismatched. Wrong girls, or wrong stuff. Your place sounds cool, but I think they might rather see the kind of room that women get taken in the movies (and I don't mean "Big").

On a separate issue, I've had some gorgeous women come back to my room and sit on my bed, and I completely blow it when they mention the healing powers of crystals or pyramid power or something. If I'd just let it go, everything would have been cool... Maybe you have the same visceral reaction to ignorant people? You realise it's just not worth it.

FLPUA · 2011-02-07T04:25:57+00:00

Interesting discussion on mystery. You definitely don't want to give anything away that you haven't explicitly decided to give away. It sucks in the case of a living space, because your whole life is laid out for all to see. If it were up to me, I would have made my room off limits, or at least not made it a public viewing event, lol. If by chance somebody comes across a revealing item that reflects my hobbies or personality, I OWN it, pun mildly intended. OP came across as having something to hide, and that's not what mystery means, in my opinion. Mystery means being the master of your domain and maintaining the frame of your life, and who is apart of it. When this girl started drilling OP about being a nerd, it sounded like OP felt like it was something to hide.

her perception of my value had diminished. Which, ultimately, made me less interested in her.

That's a big WTF statement right there. OP's essentially saying his attraction to a woman is based off of how attracted she is to you. That's a red flag, in my book.

gpua · 2011-02-07T06:26:37+00:00

My philosophy has always been that your bedroom/bathroom is your best wingman.

MonkeySteriods · 2011-02-07T04:58:38+00:00

Deck of playing cards

rotund · 2011-02-07T08:00:32+00:00

Aside from not being an absolute pig sty, I don't think it should really matter all that much... You probably shouldn't put a lot of concern into what she's going to think of your living area, beyond basic cleanliness.

2011-02-07T15:38:06+00:00

Your room should be clean and fresh! That doesn't mean it has to be totally spotless, but at the very least crack a window and put the dishes in the sink. And put the damn dirty clothes in a hamper. The "funky college dude" smell is a bane to women. Do whatever you can to eliminate it without totally bombing the place with synthetic scents.
Your room should be reasonably uncluttered.
You should have decent curtains. Many apartments come with Venetian blinds, which are ugly and cold. A nice curtain on a nice curtain rod will make a huge difference.
Have at least a little bit of decoration. You don't want to look like a sad divorcé who moved into his own apartment a month ago. (This look includes little/shitty furniture, no decorations, no personality, vertical blinds, etc.)
Have nice warm lighting. Candles are best but you shouldn't be burning candles the second anyone comes into your room. So have a lamp that gives off a similar warm light. Low-wattage bulbs are often good for this.
Get a plant or two. Just a normal, easy to care for houseplant, like a pothos (they are almost impossible to kill as long as you don't overwater them). It will make the room seem more livable.
Regarding nerd paraphernalia or anything else that is particularly revealing about your personality: Less is more. You don't have to pretend to be someone else, but you also don't have to overwhelm her with your hobbies and interests whenever she has her eyes open.
For god's sake, make your fucking bed!

leevs11 · 2011-02-07T19:45:48+00:00

Go for clean and uncluttered.

Don't be worried about any of your nerdy decorations. Just don't be ashamed of them in front of the girl. She was shit testing you to see what your reaction would be. Be proud and confident of your interests and she will stay interested. If you are ashamed or pretend like you aren't really into something nerdy, she will know and that will be what lowers your value.

2011-02-07T03:13:21+00:00

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2011-02-07T04:19:29+00:00

[permanently deleted]

Title	The room/apartment (as in, your room/apartment)
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	13
Comments	39
Date	February 6, 2011 11:35 PM UTC (15 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/fgikk/the_roomapartment_as_in_your_roomapartment/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/the-roomapartment-as-in-your-roomapartment.1315317 https://theredarchive.com/post/1315317

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