Seddit, what am I supposed to do with my hands/arms during a date?

itsmevichet · 2012-10-24T14:44:43+00:00

The title reminded me of this.

I'll assume you're at the coffee shop/bar/restaurant with a lady. Here's the thing:

If you're not comfortable touching a girl, she will detect that once you try.
Even if you are comfortable touching a girl, she might not be comfortable with you.
Either way, the strategy is the same. You have to get comfortable with touching, and the only way to get that comfort with it is by doing it.

Hundreds of guides and pointers have been written about this, so do some searching. As a primer, start with light touching. Light shove on the arm if you get her to laugh. Or leading her to another part of the room by offering your hand or arm. If she warms up to you and starts standing closer than you'd let most people stand, put your hand on her lower back.

Other than that, stop overthinking it.

Remember this: kino is the BEST way to tell if a girl is into you. If she responds positively to it, you're in. If you're GOOD at it (you're not, otherwise you wouldn't be asking), you can get a girl who starts with a neutral attitude towards you to start warming up.

Of course, if she responds negatively to any casual touching (staying still, backing off, etc etc), she's not into you and likely will never be.

Touch brings out our instincts.

2012-10-24T20:05:07+00:00

My sister says put them down her pants.....whattahoe :D

SpinMyRiki · 2012-10-24T15:23:21+00:00

use them while talking. don't hide them.

while making points or telling her something funny use your hand in movements that stress what you say.

if you're listening: keep them still! just assume natural positions, like when you're talking to your buddies you using them somehow too right?

take up space with your body and let your hands rest as much as you can when she talks. it's also interesting to note what bodylanguage one exposes when placing the hands somewhere. if it's something interesting or captivating to listen to, do the "coltrane" over your lower chin. just don't ever "hide" your face behind your hands. also don't touch your ears or stroke your neck, it's a sign of insecurity.

caulking · 2012-10-25T03:34:49+00:00

cross your arms to hide your boner

Xeonit · 2012-10-25T15:44:25+00:00

Pick your nose.

Tortheldrin · 2012-10-24T21:32:49+00:00

[permanently deleted]

glassuser · 2012-10-24T17:13:34+00:00

Touch her!

TheySeeMeComing · 2012-10-27T01:55:07+00:00

The more you think about it the more awkward it is. Just see what you do. If your at a bar with your hands in your pocket or crossed you are not giving good signals take em out. Put your hand on the edge of the bar or around a drink, anywhere but your pockets.

Better yet, use it to physically communicate with people around you. Are you telling a story, use visuals to kinda narrate it…. or use KINO.

I think the main thing is when your having a good time you tend to forget where your hands are. Unless they are in your pants. Don't do this at a bar.

At an interview on your lap or on the table, but don't be all fidgety with them either.

EDITED: Removed the Talladega NIghts because itsmevichet totally beat me too it.

Title	Seddit, what am I supposed to do with my hands/arms during a date?
Author	handsguy
Upvotes	16
Comments	12
Date	October 24, 2012 2:33 PM UTC (13 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/12092q/seddit_what_am_i_supposed_to_do_with_my_handsarms/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/seddit-what-am-i-supposed-to-do-with-my-handsarms.1341675 https://theredarchive.com/post/1341675