How to know when I'm actually being vulnerable or just emotionally vomiting?

handsomecs · 2017-01-07T20:02:51+00:00

Part of it may be how much you share, "I have trouble trusting people, because I've been cheated on before" is different from something like, "My ex girfriend cheated on me with my best friend for 5 years, and all my friends cheat on their SO's and my mom left my dad for her tennis coach after he lost his job so now I can't trust the women I date".

Also, why specifically do you think you've done EV, but not being vulnerable? The better examples you give us, the better we could help. This is a perfect time to practice being vulnerable btw :)

mcr00sterdota · 2017-01-08T01:57:48+00:00

I think EV is telling her the whole sob story. Whereas being vulnerable is just keeping it short.

clothcutballs · 2017-01-07T23:36:07+00:00

This night vary based on people. I think it's all about the spin you put on after it. Like let's say you share "x happened" and you haven't had the chance to emotionally process it and put a positive spin on it like "I learned Y about myself from it".

I think if you have the positive spin from it, it shows that you've processed it already, and don't have the emotional baggage related to it (also probably body language and eye contact as well)

Jacob_961 · 2017-01-08T07:37:09+00:00

Vulnerable has more to do with going after what you want. Going for a kiss and revealing your intention puts you in a vulnerable position.

asiasocialite · 2017-01-08T17:04:14+00:00

Yo dudegrt,

This is actually a great questions because it is a thin line between both.

I have told girls a little bit about my background and lower class upbringing and I notice they lose attraction. It is so upsetting because they were sharing their problems a minute before.

This can be extremely painful and upsetting for the kind of guy that is naturally more emotional.

So I have a new rule. I only share with girls my emotions that are positive. Let me give you an example so you don't think I am complete bullshit.

FAIL: "Yeah I actually had alot of emotional problems in the past and ruined most relationships"

I don't say that anymore.

WIN: I know the rule is I shouldn't tell you how beautiful you are but you are so my style!"

This is being vulnerable because you actually probably shouldn't say this to a girl on a date. It could come across as weak. But if you put positive high emotional energy into it and then go to the next part of the conversation right after it will give her a little bump. "Bump" a surge of energy and excitement. You were vulnerable let her know your true feelings for her.

The truth is if you are a super emotional guy you probably want to let this stuff out all the time. Don't do it but you could just let a little bit out at a time.

Think of yourself as an X-Man. Your power may be having intense sesitive emotions. If you use them well it can be strength. If you let them run wild the powers will become a curse.

Keep going dude. As long as you keep trying and learning it is going to work out.

Shawn Cameron www.asiasocialite.com

SilverCurve · 2017-01-08T00:59:13+00:00

You share what you feel like, but at the same time watch how she respond. If she looks interested and gives IOI, then continue. If she looks disinterested, stop it and switch topic. Being vulnerable is no different than physical escalation, really. After all, physical escalation is a form of vulnerability.

Ruthlessman · 2017-01-07T19:13:38+00:00

If she is DTF and that is all you want, being vulnerable and open seems to be a bad idea to me. Emotional vomiting should not be as much risk if she wants connection also in my opinion. Unless you very negative person.

Title	How to know when I'm actually being vulnerable or just emotionally vomiting?
Author	dudegrt
Upvotes	27
Comments	21
Date	January 7, 2017 5:59 PM UTC (9 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/5mlqg1/how_to_know_when_im_actually_being_vulnerable_or/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/how-to-know-when-im-actually-being-vulnerable-or.1418245 https://theredarchive.com/post/1418245

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