Should we be vulnerable with everyone around us, according to Mark Manson?

shoganaiyo · 2016-02-23T19:54:57+00:00

I took it to mean with everyone because it's not something you practice in a set, but something to internalize. It's about being okay with being vulnerable.

IANAPUA_Yet · 2016-02-23T19:57:43+00:00

If "vulnerability" means pouring out your soul, you should only do that when it's relevant, preferably to someone who is interested in you to that degree.

If "vulnerability" means being your authentic self, even when some of the people around want you to behave differently, then yes, you should always do that. That's assuming, of course, that your authentic self isn't a complete asshole.

farfennugen · 2016-02-23T21:09:34+00:00

When you go into a social situation, if you are acting as you would around your best friend who you are comfortable with, you are being vulnerable.

In a lot of situations, many of us tend to act like who we think people want us to act like. Dates that come from an online dating service are an excellent example. Sometimes I go on dates where the other person is so very obviously trying hard to make it known that they are hard-working simply because it is a quality that I list is an imperative. I imagine I do the same sometimes to women who I become digitally enamored with.

Being vulnerable is simply expressing yourself, even if it might be at odds with what the situation dictates.

Mark does an excellent job of explaining it and explaining that it is easier to be vulnerable when you have value to stand on (there is no easy way out). However, it is still tough to see until we pry ourselves out of our own biases, create value, and "be ourselves". It's kind of like not knowing you have something in your teeth because you don't own a mirror.

LeeLuaP · 2016-02-23T21:43:49+00:00

I took it as, being vulnerable means being okay with who you are.

StevieBoyB · 2016-02-23T20:54:47+00:00

I wouldn't say with everyone, but around people you trust and know. It's okay to be a little vulnerable with strangers to test the waters, but some people shouldn't be trusted with vulnerable information and you need to figure out these people fast.

AttractandSeduce · 2016-02-23T23:14:22+00:00

I don't suggest being vulnerable to everyone. At least not to the same degree. Showing your vulnerability is something special you share with someone that makes your bond even stronger.

Sharing your vulnerability with everyone makes the "magic" of vulnerability less effective.

Being friendly and humane to everyone is one thing. Deeply opening yourself up to everyone is another.

whenfoom · 2016-02-24T00:07:34+00:00

The idea is you do things that suggest you have a special relationship w/ that person. You know how you interact w/ ppl who you have generic relationships w/ (even generic friends). So you do things w/ the person you don't do w/ most others. The kinds of things you talk about, the tone you use, the way you touch them, etc. You present yourself as vulnerable bc that way of treating them is an invitation, and they can accept or reject your invitation to treat you in a special way as well.

elijahsantos · 2016-02-24T09:04:43+00:00

I would say I act myself around anyone, it doesn't matter. When it comes to being vulnerable, with my emotions, that's only towards my girl.

Woujo · 2016-02-23T23:17:55+00:00

No of course not, are you crazy? Don't be vulnerable with your boss.

Title	Should we be vulnerable with everyone around us, according to Mark Manson?
Author	dudegrt
Upvotes	22
Comments	16
Date	February 23, 2016 7:40 PM UTC (10 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/478d6n/should_we_be_vulnerable_with_everyone_around_us/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/should-we-be-vulnerable-with-everyone-around-us.1305241 https://theredarchive.com/post/1305241

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