I had really bad oneitis this year. I started spending time with my friend and fell in "love". Oneitis is not love. Its an unhealthy obsession... a form of anxiety.

Anyways, i drove myself crazy, i work in a quiet office so my thoughts ran wild. So here are the steps to stop oneitis from my experience.

  1. Cut contact, dont have to completely ghost her if shes your friend, just because shes not into you, doesnt mean you have to be a dick. Id say reducing contact to 10% of what is was.

  2. No social media- this is huge, don't follow her on any platform. At all. No exceptions.

  3. Go out and meet girls. Tinder, bumble, bars, friends of friends, etc. Just meet a bunch of girls. Doesnt matter if they hook up with you, date you, just friends, just talk to a bunch of girls. Eventually you will realize what a girl whose really into you will act like. This is a sobering realization.

  4. Develop oneitis. For yourself. Most important step. This is to prevent oneitis from happening again. To do this, stop making girls your priority. Find some hobbies, find a mission in life that doesnt revolve around girls and be honest with yourself. For me it was surfing, rock climbing, mma. My life mission went from being good enough for a hot girlfriend (pathetic mentality) to living freely and helping others

  5. Fuck a bunch of girls, be safe, be honest, have fun. Make sure you do step 4 before doing this.

  6. Optional - talk to your oneitis girl again, closure is good. But dont fall down the rabbit hole again. If you hesitate to talk to her again, you're still under her spell.