Should i change myself?

super_thowaway · 2018-05-08T07:58:25+00:00

One misconception is that we are static personalities, that we have a 'true self' and that to change ourselves is to also betray ourselves. The facts are that we all change over time. We all are products of our upbringings. We all have aspects we like about ourselves and dislike about ourselves. Changing who you are isn't about censoring yourself or hiding your true identity. It's also not about turning into something you don't want to be or being inauthentic.

You can be you, and you can change, at the same time. Your funny antics are part of you, chances are people like you because of it. But maybe you don't have a good sense of when the time is right, when it's appropriate, and what lines you should cross and what lines you shouldn't.

We are social creatures, adapting to other people is a core skill of being a human. Picking up on their needs is not a betrayal of yourself.

b0100010 · 2018-05-08T05:04:39+00:00

absolutely. Always push yourself to be a better person and constantly change yourself

intercitty · 2018-05-08T08:19:19+00:00

Ive been feeling the same lately. Im brutally honest and dont give two shits what people think. On the otherhand I feel like I could get more closes by keeping my mouth shut sometimes and sculpting sentences to her needs and wants. Its all a trial and error game. I see what works and what doesnt and like the other commenters said just adjust accordingly youll get there you just have to recognize where the failure occurs and adjust it.

plowzedong · 2018-05-08T11:03:31+00:00

How can you not change???

TheXXL · 2018-05-09T06:31:55+00:00

But at the same time i make weird jokes,

Are you making those jokes so others give you attention or even so they like you? It's not a problem to make jokes that you feel are funny, only if you actually do them because you are genuinely amused by it and don't care about what others think.

talk a lot

Are you scared of silence? Maybe you think by talking a lot people will like you? It's incredible how much you can hear If you stop talking and let others do the talking. Try it out.

and feel like people dont like who i am

Well, if you always joke with them he sole intention to make others like you, while also always talking like a waterfall, sure, most people won't like you because it's annoying and weak.

Otherwise you might just be insecure which would also explain your behavior. All in all I think it's insecurity, from what you wrote. If this is the case, then yes. Change your behavior.

Title	Should i change myself?
Author	wildbear21
Upvotes	4
Comments	6
Date	May 8, 2018 4:49 AM UTC (8 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/8hu3lx/should_i_change_myself/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/should-i-change-myself.1446239 https://theredarchive.com/post/1446239

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