A lot of people don't really understand what seduction is about. They see it as "an effort to provide", "a play to perform". What if I told you that seduction requires you to do nothing?

Let's say you meet a beautiful woman (let's call her Ariana), you are interested in her, and she is initially interested in you. And somehow, you manage to schedule a date in a street bar (let's ignore the steps that led to this at the moment).

So, you are in the street bar and you start discussing and discovering each other. Ariana is a very honest and transparent person, she basically tells you everything. She tells you that she is not a very loyal person but that she learned from her mistakes, she tells you she is vegan, she tells you she hates violence.

Now, let's say that you are literally the opposite of her. You would never imagine cheating on someone, you enjoy eating meat, you love watching boxing fights.

The way that are you going to behave and reply to that is what is going to determine the outcome.

1st outcome. The needy one. Let's say that you never met a girl before and she is the first girl you ever talk to. You never had a girlfriend, you never had sex. Her value is going to be very high in your eyes and you are going to, unconciously, distort the reality, just to make her fall for you. You will say that you "don't care that she has not been loyal as long as she learned from her mistakes" -> lie, you could not imagine someone cheating on his partner, that "you don't care that she is vegan and you don't eat a lot of meet anyway" -> lie, you enjoy eating meat, and that you "also hate violence" -> lie again, you watch boxing fights. The date goes and you keep agreeing with her but you 1/ still haven't kissed her yet, 2/ still haven't done anything to escalate things. Why? You didn't have the balls to do it, simple as that, you kept agreeing with everything she said, in the hope of getting into her pants. The most probable outcome is you orbiting around her and her seeing you as a friend.

2nd outcome. The non-needy one. Now, let's say that you met at least one girl before and you know what relationships are about. You also have multiple options, so you don't care about the outcome, you just want to spend a good moment with her. Her value is going to be lower than in the previous scenario so you won't basically care about what you say or do (although you'll of course respect her). You won't feel the need to agree with her by lying and you probably will clearly tell her that you are not a match. You'll just cut her short if you disagree with something and want to express it. And if she does not interest you, you'll just next her. What is the outcome of this situation? She will be seduced by you. It does not mean that it will lead to anything but she will be seduced.

Seduction is outcome-independent. Seducing someone does not mean it will lead necessarily to something. A lot of us have probably seduced someone without even noticing. See that non-interesting girl in your friends? She is probably more seduced by you than the hottest of your friends. Not because of her looks, but because of the way you behave around her, the way you express yourself, the vulnerability you show to her. You care less about what you say so you are more yourself and do more mistakes. Hence, the importance of vulnerability.

Girls don't care about what you say. They care about your intent. If your intent is to get her, she will sense it and will be turned off.

Now, the example I gave is pretty shitty and simplistic. Things are not black and white. Not all girls are the opposite of you. Nobody is totally needy or totally non-needy. We are all in-between. Some are more needy than non-needy, others more non-needy than needy.

If you want to be less needy, there is no magic trick. The more you have a reason to put someone on a pedestal, the more you'll distort things to try to seduce her, which will most of the time lead to a negative outcome.

Some people will tell you "you most have multiple options so you don't fall for the only option you have". Although this sounds pretty stupid, it ain't that wrong. You must see abundance in your world. If you can't see other options than the current one, then you will unconciously fall for that only option. It doesn't mean that you should be texting multiple girls at the same time. What it means fundamentally is that if you are confident in yourself, you'll see that there are a lot of interesting women in the world that could make a great partner. So, there is no reason to try to get that only girl that came randomly in your life.