Anyone just not feel like a man anymore

DivorceRecoveryMen · 2024-04-02T15:44:29+00:00

Been there done that. When she pulled the divorce trigger on me, I felt less than a man. I begged, pleaded and promised the world in order to get her back. I finally picked myself up by my bootstraps and got my man card back. I started to heal and realize my worth and my positive self-confidence was so important in my recovery. Looking back on it, I feel I needed to feel that shitstorm in order to get where I am today. It was a jumpstart of my moving on. Lean into the pain, release all the bullshit that doesn't matter anymore and start healing.

judasholio · 2024-04-02T13:14:26+00:00

Much love to you brother. Take your time to heal, and take your time to regain the feeling of masculinity.

If it stimulates your intellect, read up on philosophy, get caught up on world events, get into stereotypical men’s hobbies, and make connections and friendships with other men.

It’s not an easy switch of “man up“, and it’s not the easy switch of some divorce coach feigning tough love by hurling a stream of insults at you until you get angry.

Haunting_Profession3 · 2024-04-02T13:11:46+00:00

Hey! Fuck all that nonsense.

You are living in your own head, killing your self mentally. We have ALL been there, and we absolutely know what you are feeling. I am here to tell you it’s lies.

First and foremost, your social status or ex wife don’t define you as a man, nor does your medical procedure.

There is absolutely no easy way out of this, but there many steps you can take starting immediately to get you out of that head space.

The first thing you need to do is start working out. I know you have some sort of disability, but don’t let it be an excuse. You can find lots of things to do in there regardless of what your amputation was.

Lift weights, run, walk, whatever the fuck you can get your self to do that gets your heart rate up, and sweat rolling. Force your self into that bitch for a minimum of 4-5 days a week for the first couple weeks. Even if you spend just 45 min or an hour there each time, it’s going to start hacking away at your lack of confidence. It’s going to start to clearing your mind, and it’s going to make you feel like you’re getting out and being “social”.

If you are struggling to get the motivation to get into the gym, go spend $30 on some pre work out, drink it and get dressed like you’re going to go to the gym, rec or whatever you want. It will help you get that motivation in the beginning.

Next, rid of all the junk food, alcohol, soda, and anything else that’s designed to taste good or make you feel good. Your health is going to play one of the biggest rolls in your comeback story, and it’s the easiest one for you to control. Eat a healthy, nutritious diet, and get all of that shit we are not supposed to have in our bodies, out of your body.

Go to a men’s health clinic, and have them run your blood work. It sounds very likely that your testosterone levels are low, and that doing TRT would greatly improve your life. Testosterone contributes towards loads of mental health performance, and it will get you back to feeling like you run shit.

Last big thing, do not focus on or desire women for the time being. You need to love your self, and invest in your self for as long as it takes. You are always going to be your biggest investment, don’t cut your self short in anyway. Keep your eyes locked in on bettering your self in every single way, every day.

It’s going to be a long process, but nothing will feel more rewarding as you watch the hard work begin to pay off.

We are all here for you, and we will always help you with any questions or help needed.

This is your life, make the most of it and make the changes you can right away to start to fix how you feel. I promise you that sitting around and thinking about how bad you think you are will never do anything positive for you. It will also never go away or get any easier if you don’t force your self out of it and start to introduce healthy and positive changes.

Best of luck to you my guy, use as a shoulder when you need it, and keep us updated.

SomeoneInQld · 2024-04-02T13:02:22+00:00

You and I are men because of our actions, not by who we are currently with, or what other people think of us.

We will both get over these hard times, if you ever want to talk, reach out to me.

LeftySmithy · 2024-04-02T13:01:19+00:00

I don't know all the specifics of your situation but I do know that when you are in a rut of despair It's difficult to get out of without consistent work.

you have to do things everyday that are beneficial for you even if you don't feel like it.

everyday you need to get up and take your vitamins/meds.

everyday you need to get exercise in.

(If you're a spiritual person) everyday you need to talk to God and get into his word.

everyday you need to try to be thankful for what you still have.

everyday you need to talk yourself up and say positive things about yourself to yourself.

I'm not completely consistent about it.... But when I am I seem to do a lot better.

It's time to fire on all cylinders, regardless of how you feel.

TweedStoner · 2024-04-02T13:00:08+00:00

Why did you have an amputation?

Title	Anyone just not feel like a man anymore
Author	Wacodunk
Upvotes	33
Comments	13
Date	April 2, 2024 12:47 PM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/Divorce_Men
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/Divorce_Men/comments/1btxvbl/anyone_just_not_feel_like_a_man_anymore/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/Divorce_Men/anyone-just-not-feel-like-a-man-anymore.1513954 https://theredarchive.com/post/1513954

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