My Cousin (14) is an Andrew Tate fan, how do I show him the truth?

Personal_Dirt3089 · 2024-09-03T18:03:24+00:00

Andrew Tate is a human trafficker and he says that having sex with women is "gay". He's a joke.

Copy pasting this old post of mine again about the redpill being ragebait, you might find things similar to andrew tate's BS:

ragebait is addicting. However, a lot of these videos are also made to start mild, even sounding rational in the beginning, then escalating to ragebait and "only our method can solve this!" type talking. Also, these people rehearse this and they take time writing things that will have this pace and tone. These videos are designed to do that. It's not just some guys talking naturally.

"Women are different from men and that causes some confusions" {sounding mild and maybe even rational at first} then somehow leads to "and as a result, 23 year olds are all making onlyfans and going on the cock carousel with the same 10% of men and no woman will ever like you" {ragebait} and this somehow leads to "but our method will get you the women, especially the 20 year old virgins that have been saving themselves just for you, to start flocking to you and want to marry you even though you are totally going to get a harem with our methods" {salespitch}

Yamureska · 2024-09-03T19:41:03+00:00

Andrew Tate once called out Men who enjoyed cooking and said such Men are "Nerds" and that "Chefs are worms". I.e. he basically implied that cooking is inherently Feminine and Men shouldn't do it and rely on Women to do it instead.

It sounds more Juvenile than anything (which is probably why it appeals to your cousin). But let's examine the argument. Cooking and making your own food is important because it basically means Self Sufficiency. Is that what an "Alpha Male" is? Someone so utterly dependent that he can't even make his own food? Is that the kind of Man your Cousin wants to be? Food is important in maintaining the body. Wouldn't it be better to know how to make your own food so you're at least 90% sure you're getting the "alpha male" physique that Tate's selling you? It seems pretty weak or Beta to rely on others (especially Women, going by Tate's own logic) for that.

If your Cousin (or anyone) wants to be Independent and self sufficient, Andrew Tate's bad advice is not the way to go.

Nuclearwaifu · 2024-09-04T08:14:51+00:00

Ask him if he even likes women and if he says yes then ask him why he‘d think any woman would want to be near him if he talks about them, real people, this way. Also another one that works in some cases is asking how he‘d feel if his sister or mom was lured in by a type like him to be abused and used like an object. If he‘d feel ok watching a man like tate treat women close to him that way too. Cause usually that also helps in realizing women are humans.

In general though it is difficult cause the red pill is a cult pretty much. They prey on boys like him. Using his struggles to feed him into this dysfunctional man relying only on these grifters. So don‘t try to preach ask questions instead. Put the focus on him and let him trip and also examine his own feelings and thoughts all by himself. Cause your takes can be ignored. But he can hardly ignore his own so the best way is to let him come to the conclusion of how this actually is crazy thinking all by himself. With questions like: „why do you like him? How would you feel if he treated a girl you really like like he does and says? What do you think about him using his fans to exploit for money? Aren‘t you upset that he was exploiting fans like you though? Using only fans for example to scam them while condemning women for the same thing? Stuff like that. Let him think about it deeper. Cause usually the issue is that they don‘t think too much about it. Cause that can shake up cult like beliefs. You are not meant to think. Just to listen and obey. At least in cults. I‘d say tate is pretty much that.

ChicoBrillo · 2024-09-03T23:06:46+00:00

I'd say don't fight him to adamantly otherwise he'll categorize you as a delusional sjw or something like that.

What I do in these situations is ask genuine questions with a sincere tone that may poke holes in the belief system or bread crumb them to their own conclusions.

"Oh interesting, so do you think your mom chose your dad because he was alpha?" "What does it mean to be alpha?" Etc

Snuffleupagus03 · 2024-09-04T00:09:31+00:00

There are counter people on YouTube. A conversation can be tough and make people defensive. A link to a quippy video may seep into the cracks a bit.

Check out the real speech prof and chadchad on YouTube. They are pretty light touches with humor and take a run and some red pill bs.

ChelseaDagger16 · 2024-09-03T20:14:40+00:00

He isn’t getting laid, he believes Andrew Tate will get him laid. He will support Tate unless he fails to get laid and he re-assesses or finds a better way.

I’d simply say you or his dad show him the ways of interacting with women and forming romantic connections with them.

BoxOfPineapples · 2024-09-04T06:02:38+00:00

Redpill bs is a mindset you can't break in a convo sadly. You need to guide him to that conclusion, and you can help do that by poking holes in the ideology ever so slightly. You don't want to push back too hard, cause otherwise he'll close his mind to you and it'll be much harder to deal with. Feel free to clown on alpha dudes or Tate himself tho.

If it's an option, and you have any women friends that are willing, you can take him out with you guys and show what a healthy adult friendship looks like. Obviously that's a stretch, and you'll definitely have to explain what you're trying to do, but if it's possible then might as well go for it.

pointofyou · 2024-09-04T10:07:50+00:00

He said that his courses might be bad but some of the stuff that he is saying is true. I argued about why that was not the case and the theories are massive fallacies developed by right wing redpilled media, but it didn’t seem to go anywhere as he got super confrontational once I started pointing stuff out.

Don't fall into the trap of trying to paint Tate as evil. This will fail. Rather, we can acknowledge that Tate is rather charismatic and intelligent, and some of the things he says are both convincing and true. That's exactly what makes him dangerous though. It's important to evaluate statements independently. Just because the last 3 things he said were true/convincing, it doesn't mean that the next thing is. Furthermore, what's more important is the degree to which the untrue things he spouts are untrue. Because individual massively wrong arguments should be sufficient to deter us from giving credence to anything they say about that topic.

The fact that he got confrontational when you pointed it out is a great angle too. Point out that he's getting emotional and defensive as a result of not having talking points available to him to counter your critique. This is a fairly normal human reaction, but it's important to point out to him that this is going on. You might go as far as to question his masculinity by calling him Tate's little bitch, thus forcing him to rethink his stance in order to not fall into that frame.

He's only 14, so this might all be tough, but his parents being 'nice' may be part of the problem here. He's looking for a strong masculine figure to follow that provides clear cut answers to complex (and emotional) issues.

OffModelCartoon · 2024-09-04T00:16:35+00:00

You say his parents are nice people, but have they not noticed the rabbithole their son is going down? They haven’t heard him saying sexist and racist things? They are allowing him unfettered access to listen to known human trafficker Andrew Tate? That strikes me as odd.

My parents were conservative republicans, definitely not what anyone would call “woke,” but when they heard my brother at age 13 spouting off similar nonsense, they intervened immediately. They talked with us both about media literacy, media diet, critical thinking, and gave us examples of logical fallacies and “weasel words” to watch out for. They taught us not to consume media uncritically. They taught us to consider why someone was putting down another race or sex. What do they or their audience get out of it? Is it to reinforce their feelings of superiority? Is it because they feel bad about themselves and want to find an easy target to use as a punching bag? And to think about why women and minorities have historically been considered easy targets to use as punching bags. And to learn more historical context about the societies and cultures over time who have treated them as such, (ie: antebellum south, nazi germany, etc.) and to ask: How did that work out for them? And also to look at past genocides from all over the world and all throughout history and learn more about how these things went from talking points to real-life atrocities. How selecting people to use as scapegoats for all the things wrong with society leads to gross human rights abuses against the scapegoated.

I already wasn’t thinking like how my brother was, but I’m glad they included me in these conversations and lessons. My knowledge went from “nazis bad” to “here’s how we let this happen in the past. here’s how it can happen again. here is how to recognize when it’s happening again, in its early stages.”

I mean their response wasn’t perfect lol… They included fetuses in their list of oppressed peoples who have been genocided. And they argued against my points whenever I’d say that, based on everything they were teaching us, homophobia and anti-LGBTQ sentiment was equally abhorrent. That LGTBQ people were being scapegoated in similar ways and (this was before A LOT of laws changed regarding marriage, military service, immigration, visiting dying loved ones in hospital, HIV/AIDS public healthy) that they were facing gross systemic inequality. They seem to have come around on that realization since then though.

Anyway, I digress… it’s great that you want to talk to your cousin. Maybe examples from history of how scapegoating people based on identity leads to genocide, fascism, gross human rights abuses. In-depth examples (that a high school level history student can understand) are important because making it sound like sexist podcasts lead directly to genocide would sound downright histrionic. More about breaking down how, over a period of time, societies that adopted those types of beliefs en masse were harmed by them, and harmful to humanity as a whole.

Not suggesting you sit him down with history books though, as I doubt that would resonate. How you tackle this depends on how you usually interact. Maybe a camping trip with a long car drive and thoughtful conversation? Or if you watch movies together, maybe some movies that address these topics, followed by discussion? Playing WWII games and then chatting about it? Idk what would resonate the most with your cousin specifically.

But really… it’s disappointing his parents aren’t addressing this.

KitchenRevenue4042 · 2024-09-04T10:11:48+00:00

It might have something to do with the kind of school he is at. If his school are intolerant he could be picking things up there.

Conscious_Object_328 · 2024-09-04T14:41:18+00:00

People use kernels of truth and then wrap lies around it. Just because it has the kernel of truth, people are more willing to swallow it. Even very vitriolic things.

For example:

"Tomatoes are in the nightshade family" -true

"You are slowly killing yourself everytime you eat tomatoes. If you just stopped eating tomatoes you won't have your erectile dysfunction anymore. You will be able to run faster too. Be more fit." - false

*edit - I also started watching destiny who debated "right wingers". Just more exposure to the debate environment from all angles. I like seeing Destiny rip into idiots and scammers. I consider myself a "right wing" type person- but I don't respect criminals like Andrew Tate. None of my right-wing ppl in my family does. None of my right leaning friends do. He is not on our side. We would probably all agree he is better off dead.

It is just odd to me that "right wingers" that typically are so hard on criminals and even support the death penalty want to make an exception for one criminal.

Juventus_x · 2024-09-04T15:34:24+00:00

A summary of several decades worth of research showed that self-imposed restrictions connected to traditional masculinity are related to anxiety, intimacy problems, loneliness, and emotional dysregulation. Violating traditional male gender roles is related to substance abuse, self-objectification, and suicide. Endorsement of traditional male gender roles is related to violation of others through hostile sexism, dating violence, rape myth acceptance, and violence (Vallerga & Zerbriggen, 2022).

Show him why this isn't healthy for him first. Then show him why Andrew Tate is full of shit. There is so much research on the subject; Redpill beliefs are proven to be pseudoscience. I'm sure you can simplify the findings in a way this kid can understand.

the_unraveling · 2024-09-03T19:17:17+00:00

Nothing you can do to change someone else.

Only thing I will say is that people fall victim to ideologies when they don’t have good role models or positive examples to look to. But remember you can’t make anyone look up to you.

oldcousingreg · 2024-09-03T20:47:58+00:00

Tell him there’s easier ways to end up in prison

OniFloppa · 2024-09-06T06:56:19+00:00

As someone who was basically a bitch , then went really redpill and blackpill and then somewhere in the middle , I would say to him to just experiment and get different perspectives. The Tate brothers exploited inexperienced women to get money , and then spent it all on material crap. If being a man means paving a path of suffering to then become overly indulgent in physical pleasure ,then I don't want to be a man.

Make him read philosophy , biographies , make him read the Bible , make him read about monks. I would say Andrew Tate is very unimpressive to what other men have done. He is no different from an overly wealthy selfish stuck up nobleman from 1000 years ago. Make him realize there is no virtue in being selfish like him. Real men are not selfish.

AutomatShop · 2024-09-03T21:42:50+00:00

Easy: What he is learning about being masculine and muscular and strong and productive and popular won't work with women or with life.

So show him how you succeed with women and are on the path to being a millionaire soon through courtesy, poesy, pickleball, veganism etc

AssistTemporary8422 · 2024-09-03T17:58:22+00:00

Unfortunately you can't control what people believe and arguing with them often makes them feel controlled and they have a natural desire for independence. Your cousin's life is his responsibility not yours and the fact you want to control it means you might have some entanglement/attachment issues. Rather than trying to fix your cousin this is a good opportunity for you to fix yourself for example practicing being unattached to other people's life choices. Raising your cousin is his parent's responsibility and you should just accept him for who he is and decide whether you want to hang out with him as he is.

Title	My Cousin (14) is an Andrew Tate fan, how do I show him the truth?
Author	Direct-Strength7598
Upvotes	41
Comments	33
Date	September 3, 2024 5:49 PM UTC (1 year ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/ExRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/exredpill/comments/1f86e15/my_cousin_14_is_an_andrew_tate_fan_how_do_i_show/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/ExRedPill/my-cousin-14-is-an-andrew-tate-fan-how-do-i-show.1529276 https://theredarchive.com/post/1529276

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