takes so much out of you

Western-Month-3877 · 2024-11-08T17:43:01+00:00

Overthinking and expecting every step needs to be perfect can drain your energy. Stop overthinking and be a perfectionist if you’re that guy. We deal with humans, not machines. Flaws and minor flops are to be expected.
Typically introverted people experience the drain after long talks or long interaction. It’s like they need more time to recharge, because they’re not in their usual zone.
Or you try too hard to be someone that you pretend to be. Slight difference from #2, this is where you force yourself to fake smile, fake laugh, and you end up not looking as natural. It’s like deep inside you don’t really enjoy it but you do it because you know the ~~pussy~~ incentive will be rewarding.

So which one are you?

mkkpt · 2024-11-08T19:12:49+00:00

You should be having fun, or making it fun for yourself. If not, change this, figure out how.

Maybe you are a bit burnt out, in which case it's okay to take a break.

You might need to self-assess, have you missed something: Are you taking care of you physical, mental, emotional health? When was the last time you got a checkup at the GP? Are you eating healthily? Exercising? Do you need to see a therapist? When's the last time you did something fun that did not involve women? Do you have fulfilling hobbies? Fulfilling work? Do you have ambitions and goals that don't involve women? Are you involved in the Community? etc etc

What's your procedure for a "big failure"? Make sure you do something constructive - Long walk, journaling, meditation, yoga, hug a kitten, whatever. It really helps.

I recommend incorporating some king of reflective practice, Gibb Reflective cycle is good (google it) for analysing situations and long term improvement. You can write it down on in a binder, or use it as a guide when reflecting on a bad night.

Dwerg1 · 2024-11-08T22:56:52+00:00

Been there, done that, let it go and never regretted it.

If you reach the point where trying to seduce drains you then you're really off the path. You can't seduce anyone when you feel drained because you're the most seductive when you feel great.

I learned this as I hit a wall 9 years ago. I was just exhausted after spending 2 years of maximum effort trying to figure it out. I was getting laid fine enough, had a very short relationship and didn't do so bad if looking at just the numbers. However, I felt very dissatisfied and in the end I just burned out.

That's when my entire perspective changed. I realized that above all I want to feel good, I was ultimately running myself into the ground in order to achieve that, which is fucking stupid, right? So I shifted my focus from getting women directly onto making myself feel good, as quickly and as much as possible.

I quickly found ways to feel better, I could simply use feelings as guidance after all, move away from what feels worse and towards whatever feels better. As I felt better it did not take long at all before women took note of it, turns out a happy man is attractive as fuck.

It beat any seduction theory I have ever learned, my happiness above all else, even women. There is no failure because I don't take to heart anyone who doesn't want me, they're just a negative force that I do not even want in my life. Being rejected is a good thing, they're justing sorting themselves out of my life, had they stayed for any other reason than wanting to they would only drag me down.

I have all the motivation in the world to go forth, maybe I find something good in my exploration of life. If something is bad I can ALWAYS just simply walk away from it.

Seduction done right will fuel you, not drag you down. So if you feel like it's more of a burden then you simply aren't doing it right. It's supposed to be fun.

epimpstyle · 2024-11-09T08:41:43+00:00

Seduction done right is fun, talking to another person is an opportunity to find out new things. If you play the quantity game instead of the quality game... it's not good, you can say "rejection doesn't matter" but you're just lying to yourself, actually it's not like that and multiple rejections will have a certain weight on you.

No-Heat-591 · 2024-11-08T17:11:59+00:00

You're not that guy, you're trying to pretend to be something you're not that's where you felt it takes too much out of you.

do you need motivation to sleep and eat, As a man you don't need motivation to do something, you do what you supposed to do and you give yourself a reason to do it, when you promise yourself to do something, you do it no matter what, you don't break your own promises.

boydsmith111 · 2024-11-08T19:03:06+00:00

It is likely that fighting with reality(as Byron Katie puts it) that is 'take so much out of you'

Read/apply 'The work' by Byron Katie or the Wholeness Work/Core Transformation by Connirae Andreas

Worth-Combination306 · 2024-11-08T19:56:06+00:00

“Sometimes the juice ain’t worth the squeeze” —Ghandi

ratfooshi · 2024-11-09T00:12:22+00:00

It does when you play the quantity over quality game like most people on here.

Even Casanova burnt himself out being a fuckboy.

Seduction actually gives me life when I play the game how it's supposed to be played. Patient, ant invisible.

Blenderchampion · 2024-11-09T00:45:55+00:00

Whats a big failure?

Title	takes so much out of you
Author	rrlzsrnc
Upvotes	11
Comments	14
Date	November 8, 2024 5:00 PM UTC (1 year ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/1gmnaul/takes_so_much_out_of_you/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/takes-so-much-out-of-you.1535089 https://theredarchive.com/post/1535089

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