I can't take this anymore

-WideEyedFox- · 2025-01-03T16:15:19+00:00

Go for a walk and then come back and make peace with your Dad.

If you have stuff you want to talk about, speak to a professional, friend or family member who can help. If you don’t fancy that call the number of a free support service who will listen.(not sure which country you are in to provide one).

Whatever is going on right now is temporary, and it will pass. You have your Dad who truly cares about you. Ask him to listen, not interrupt, and not offer solutions right away (men are good at that) - just talk.

You’re not alone, these feelings will pass.

Life is not about being fair or deserving. Life is what you make it. Sure there will be failures and tough times. Those are the lessons that prepare you for the future.

Reddit / Social Media is not the best place to get help if you’re struggling, but you will always find someone who will answer.

Happy Birthday. You’ve got this. You are not done.

Soft_Training_9366 · 2025-01-03T16:28:21+00:00

happy birthday and please check on your dad

Real-Mobile-8820 · 2025-01-03T18:13:56+00:00

Man, don’t let outside triggers get to you. I find that I think and do best within my own company. I enjoy my own solitude instead of giving towards a fault, someone who doesn’t have my best interests at heart.

I’ve had enough dysfunction from women, I’m taking a good two or five years off from dating indefinitely. And even then I don’t care all that much. I have to travel to a whole other country or somewhere in order to connect with more “normal” people and couples because fellow NY’ers are mean, noisy, and toxic people to be around.

Let them come to you and if they should, remain cautious. Believe me, all I did after 2023 breakup was run for miles on end per day. Really helped immensely with my health and overall healing journey.

BTW HAPPY BDAY :)

alter_furz · 2025-01-03T15:41:41+00:00

don't even know what to say my dude.

are you trying to get anywhere in life?

if you aren't, try to fix that. running towards the finish line is more productive than standing at the start line being mad about people finishing before you.

Mojorizen2 · 2025-01-03T18:11:26+00:00

Stop expecting and start accepting. I’ve been trying hard lately to not ruminate on the things that depress me. It’s not easy but it’s gets easier with practice and it will help a lot with how you are feeling. One of the most common things depressed people do is ruminate and continually think about their problems and things that make them upset. Also, there is no guarantee that people will love you, so you take care of and accept the ones that do. Family is all that really matters in this life. I would apologize to your dad. It will make both of you feel better. He will likely understand and accept your apology.

Look into stoicism. It’s all about accepting whatever life will give. So much is out of our control and often we just have to go with the flow. And yes, life is shit sometimes, but I’m sure there are people who love you and who you love, and things/people that if you lost it would crush you. Appreciate them now while you have them.

MorticianDin · 2025-01-03T15:59:29+00:00

oh... well i would advise you to try and seek psychological help, like a therapist, for example. if you have troubles communicating with other people, you could be neurodivergent, traumatized or even both. it usually comes together

try to look deeper into your interests and see what do you like, and is there any community you can join

tty also to look into yourself and your nature, what makes you happy, what type of people you like and don't? can you only love women or is there anything else? have you ever wanted to try something new but couldn't try?

try look for friends, with whom you're similar and with whom you can be emotionally vulnerable, because emotional vulnerability sometimes in life helps with frustration and pain a lot.

if life is too hard for you, its not wrong to ask and/or pay for help, medical or emotional. don't hold bad toxic people in your life, look for someone who'll appreciate you as you

hope this helps...

WV8VW · 2025-01-03T15:45:21+00:00

Most marriages end in divorce initiated by women. There are many types of suffering.

Smitty1017 · 2025-01-03T18:58:16+00:00

That attitude will NEVER get you to where you want in life. Shit sucks, shits not fair, people suck, whatever. But you are only beating yourself here.

Accomplished-Fig-807 · 2025-01-03T18:47:36+00:00

I felt that in my soul

ObscureRyan · 2025-01-03T15:41:09+00:00

Happy Birthday bud.

Able_Communication60 · 2025-01-03T23:56:03+00:00

Happy belated birthday and check on your Dad. Everyone in life will disappoint you will never be there for you, except your parents. Go make peace with your Dad, hug him and tell him you love him. I lost my dad in 2018, and got divorced soon after. Lost my mom in 2023. Trust me, you do not want this loneliness. Find a professional to speak with and maybe get your hormones checked. Godspeed to you

iainmf · 2025-01-03T18:12:02+00:00

here is a list of men's support organisations that you might find helpful

https://www.reddit.com/r/MensRights/comments/1ayte67/list_of_mens_aid_orgs_and_advocacy_groups_world/

TrilIias · 2025-01-04T01:45:52+00:00

What does your meltdown have to do with men's rights?

GodHand7 · 2025-01-03T17:50:36+00:00

Apologize to your dad, keep calm, adapt, overcome, other than actually fighting for mens rights now that is the only way right now to survive.

ryanakasha · 2025-01-03T16:40:13+00:00

You guys are clearly not okay

PoodankMcGee · 2025-01-03T17:10:01+00:00

It's brutal man. Men in general are already shit on by feminist society.

And if youre an inkywell on top of that life just gets beyond tolerable because not only youre getting shit on by feminism but also by other men that flaunt their sexhaving in front of you.

You can try and self improve or whatever but it doesnt always help. And oftentimes 'self improvement' is really code for hustling and grinding on the plantation and giving society your best effort just to get pittance in return. Not eveyone gets the same results for the effort they put in, just a brutal reality there.

I find it best just to live out of spite and convert that feeling of hatred and frustration into a motivation that benefits your condition or makes life more chill. Either that or just detach fron it all entirely and go full escapist hermit mode.

Idk this clown world is a joke.

Original-Cat-4543 · 2025-01-03T18:04:08+00:00

The things i wanna say to you would get me banned.

KingpinPenguin97 · 2025-01-03T19:05:00+00:00

What's on your mind?

Talk about it with us. What are your frustrations? There are a lot of us like you. By understanding each other's situations, we can talk about it. And hopefully enrich our individual lives from it. I agree with everyone saying that step one is to sit down and have a chat with your dad. Make up with him. Vent your frustrations. The worst he could do is not help. But if he can give you any nuggets on what you CAN do, then it was not in vain. It is a starting point.

wild_wanderer140 · 2025-01-03T20:28:13+00:00

Just an advice..... Write stories or poems or do drawing do something creative at times when you feel you are alone sitting in your room and no-one invites you to the get-together they are enjoying......

rally_beard · 2025-01-03T21:10:42+00:00

So sorry to hear, brother. I actually see a bunch of people on this thread who are showing you compassion. I bet a lot of them would be willing to talk with you more over dm (myself included). Maybe one could become a friend.

Social skills/relational skills are a learnable and improvable thing.

Other comments here are not compassionate, do your best to ignore them.

I see lots of good suggestions here. I’m sure many are not your cup of tea. Any one of them would be a better idea than killing yourself. I hope your next birthday is better.

chmeric · 2025-01-03T21:51:25+00:00

We never give up:

BeardedBill86 · 2025-01-03T23:21:52+00:00

Have you tried not giving a fuck? Genuinely.

Social media lies to us every day, we're assaulted by the top percenters from every angle, the successfull, the smart, the beautiful, the happy.

But that may as well be a story book for 99% of us, because we will never see any of that shit, no matter what bullshit self-help or get-rich or whatever other thing you read.

So accept that, also have the context that you're not a 7 year old african child whose been beaten tortured and starved waiting to die after daily suffering.

Context is all you can give yourself, don't be jealous of the image (not even the reality behind closed doors) you see of others, it leads to nothing but pain.

compmanio36 · 2025-01-04T01:20:22+00:00

Perception is not reality my bro. All those "happy couples" have problems of their own too. I know it's hard to believe that from your POV and your headspace, but it's true.

Stay strong and you don't know me at all but you can vent to me if it helps you feel better. Thought about ending things too more than once but think of this: you don't always feel this way. You may feel like you do, now, but you didn't at some earlier point. Those points never come again if you don't stick around.

Scarboroughwarning · 2025-01-04T02:38:35+00:00

You never heard anyone say "they looked so happy, I can't believe they split up"? Or "I can't believe they were cheating, they didn't seem the type" or "that person is so confident, I wish I was like them" or literally a thousand other sayings?

Dude, cut yourself, and those "happy" couples some slack.

SmirkingSeal · 2025-01-04T06:16:20+00:00

Do you know your father's grandfather's name? Most of us don't.. You know why? It's all temporary, we'll all be forgotten in time. Stop taking life so seriously, relax, go outside, enjoy the sunshine and chill. We'll all be skeletons one day, don't speed run that shit.

Shackles_YT · 2025-01-03T17:15:30+00:00

I'm not sure if this is going to help but...

No matter how bad life can be, don't kill yourself, you have to outlive your enemies, see it through, prove to yourself and others that despite the hardships you still survived.

There's still people out there that care for you like your dad, and trust me, there's 4 billion people out there that are suffering to some degree the way you are, you're not alone

SheerFe4r · 2025-01-03T19:19:12+00:00

First off I want to say I'm so sorry you're finding things to be a struggle. I really hope life in general starts to look up for you.

In that vein, however, I think your perspective on WHY things are so miserable is quite a bit off. Judging not just by this post but also your replies in comments it doesn't feel like you've put much thought into why things are the way they currently are for you. I think this introspection will be rewarding in the end.

You say that you've never been loved, not even by parents. But why is this? Is this because you have bad parents, or is it the result of something you've done?

In the long run, rationalizing and reasoning out why things are the way they are will benefit you tremendously going forward.

As for feeling bad when seeing things like couples try to lean more on the stoic side, be (more) untouchable and unmovable when it comes to those aspects you can't control in the first place.

lowsodiummonkey · 2025-01-03T19:24:30+00:00

Don’t try and find happiness with someone else. Just do what you like and don’t worry about anyone else but yourself. If someone wants to be with you more the better but it’s also not your job to make them happy.

Badassbottlecap · 2025-01-03T19:00:47+00:00

So, are you here for advice or just to whine? 'Cos from most of your reactions it seems to be the latter.

FreshlySqueezedDonut · 2025-01-03T19:13:47+00:00

Dude, I'm not going to lie. Even if you are to get everything that you think you're missing out on right this moment, you still wouldn't be happy. You could get the parties, hot gf, and whatever you said that you want in the other comments and still not be content because deep down, it seems like you don't believe that you shouldn't have these things. Your mind will never allow you to be higher than you see yourself. Why do you think you have dudes with all of that, and they still kill themselves, but then you have dudes with absolutely nothing but are content? The problem is not outside of you. It's within you.

Happiness doesn't just happen to you. It's a habit and a choice. If you make your joy contingent on some event or thing, you will be disappointed. As an exercise, you can lay down when you are tired or can relax and think about how life would be if you truly had what you wanted and were content with it. Just allow yourself to be happy without any care for how realistic it is. It sounds woo-woo, but you literally do the same thing when you catastrophise and make up scenarios in your head that are bad for you and aren't even based on any fact. Those thoughts aren't rational and only come from what you think you are. Why not reroute this to the opposite one thought at a time?

Do something simple that you can succeed in, even if it's a small win. Instead of dwelling on your failures both past and future, dwell on your successes instead. Again, sounds woo-woo, but I'm sure you've had a mild inconvenience happen to you, and then you felt like a piece of shit because of it. We've all had those days. What I told you just now is the same mechanism as worrying but positive. It may still also be irrational, but at the very least, it'll work more in your favor to be optimistic over the little things that happen than the opposite. It's not the easiest thing to do, but you've been thinking this way for almost 30 years. You don't just take a magic pill and fix that.

I see people telling you to hit the gym, and as cliche as it sounds, do it. When you begin to see that you're getting stronger and looking better, you will feel better as a result. Start looking into things that you enjoy and get very good at them. If you don't know what you like, try something.

If you always wanted to play the guitar, for example, get one and learn the basics along with some songs that you like to hear. You will feel better when you see that you can play along to what you like, then you'll probably move and experiment with other songs and genres.

This shit all sounds cliche as fuck but notice that the emphasis is on taking the focus away from getting the validation and attention from others and bringing it back to yourself. You are making yourself proud, and you are loving the things that you are accomplishing. You are being content without someone else doing things for you. You are beginning to give yourself the love that no one else can provide for you. This will then make you think and act in a way that benefits not only you but the people around you as well. Everything else will then just be a consequence of you improving yourself and not some sort of reward for doing it. Sounds self-centered, but your issue is because you are thinking about the lives and opinions of others more than your own. This is an attempt to balance the two.

Keep your head up and believe in yourself like we believe in you.

Smooth-Purchase1175 · 2025-01-03T17:34:34+00:00

Happy birthday. Don't worry about these things, they will pass in time. Talk to your dad seriously.

yaxis50 · 2025-01-04T01:19:55+00:00

Don't let the looks of happy couples deceive you. Relationships are hell

walterwallcarpet · 2025-01-03T16:02:54+00:00

Anytime you see a 'happy' couple, spare a thought for how much the man in that couple has sold his soul and been forced to abandon the dreams he had as a kid.... in exchange for a few orgasms, the 'approval' of society, and signing his life away in blood, effectively giving power of attorney to his SO.

Here's what is going on behind the scenes... https://mgtowsolution.wordpress.com/briffaults-law/

In return for a no-limit credit card through life, she'll make minimum monthly repayments in the bedroom. If you're lucky.

So, try not to be railroaded by the apparent happiness of others. Maybe, they've been swizzed, and you haven't.

Snarti · 2025-01-03T21:54:45+00:00

I get it… you need some medication to help take the edge off. Please go see a doctor.

Glum_Rent_9765 · 2025-01-03T20:33:04+00:00

You want peace? Heavily discriminate who you associate with. Let only people in your bubble when they show even the slightest form of red flag. Your bubble, your rules. You find people with similar bubbles? You grow together in a bigger bubble. Can't give you a bigger tip than this.

derek0660 · 2025-01-03T21:09:51+00:00

Bro really censored the word humans

TheRandomGuyX · 2025-01-03T21:37:38+00:00

Dude I know how you feel. Never been truly loved. And just want to say that there is nothing wrong with you. People who tell you to seek help ignore the fact that your problems have external causes, not internal. Don't be afraid to stay yourself and do not change because society or women think you should act differently. Thank you for sharing your pain, it will fade away eventually. And there are still people who care about you we should stay strong together!

Cocrawfo · 2025-01-04T00:30:57+00:00

happy birthday dude even if today don’t feel that happy

Lets_Remain_Logical · 2025-01-04T13:25:40+00:00

Hog hug your dad. And yes, life is awfully unjust!

W1shMast3rr · 2025-01-03T18:17:26+00:00

Probably don’t want to hear this. I spent age 12-36 in relationships with women. Literally no break from girlfriends for more than a month. I was likely one of the chads the manosphere talks about, though I’d never claim that myself.

Now I’ve spent 3 years single by choice. And aside from moments of extreme horniness, nothing busting a quick nut can’t fix, I’ve never been more at peace.

Remember the story is as old as time. Evil comes from the woman. The grass isn’t always greener. Women will never love you for you, they can’t even be loyal to the creator. You’ve got to love yourself. That’s all there is. Let them doom themselves to eternal suffering, you can avoid that.

My 2c. Don’t delete yourself brother. From my perspective, women did nothing but fuck my life up, I could be more than I am today had I not chased the dragon so to speak.

ShiroYamane · 2025-01-03T18:52:07+00:00

Seems to me like you are expecting to have it just because.

Brock-Savage · 2025-01-03T18:08:40+00:00

"Is this what it is to be a man?" No, you're acting like a little girl. Grow up and start acting like a man.

Merentha8681 · 2025-01-03T16:42:32+00:00

Op, resign yourself to your fate. Any hobbies or interests?

ThePillAdvisor · 2025-01-03T18:27:15+00:00

What goals do you/did you personally have for yourself?

iainmf · 2025-01-03T19:29:05+00:00

Here is a list of men's support organisations that might be helpful

https://www.reddit.com/r/MensRights/comments/1ayte67/list_of_mens_aid_orgs_and_advocacy_groups_world/

belgianbaby · 2025-01-03T22:51:07+00:00

I love you

Ok-Manufacturer-7842 · 2025-01-03T22:29:53+00:00

Love is not unconditional. If you were a woman and met yourself, would you be attracted to yourself? If not, why? You are not targeted by anyone. Women often tend to be drawn to friendly and confident guys. Are you one or both of those? What is preventing you from being attractive? It’s not something that other people has done to you.

GymRatwBDE · 2025-01-03T23:41:58+00:00

Im with you; my penile implant started malfunctioning today, shorting out and electrocuting me every time my cock got erect, which is pretty often. But I cant get urgent corrective surgery for it, because men are deprioritized, whereas twenty fucking ladies are getting busted up for free before i can get my dick rewired

Accomplished_Pen5752 · 2025-01-04T10:30:26+00:00

Crazy how a man's cry for help leads to him being told to ignore the pain and try to be more productive to ignore the pain. Basically do more of what is hurting them. How does it make any logical sense to worsen the balance of pain and pleasure, to take up more pain. When there is no pleasure despite all these years anyway.

I don't mean pleasure as in drugs or sex etc I main simple things like being value like a human. Or a hug. Or being valued.

Like that's all there is to a man's life. Produce, provide, suffer and die.

GodFromMachine · 2025-01-03T20:10:56+00:00

You keep spamming this kind of post across five different subs at a time, trying to farm pitty upvotes. Maybe you deserve being alone in life if that's all you can do with it...

Apart-Dog1591 · 2025-01-03T19:43:12+00:00

Sorry you're having a tough time bro. You want advice? Fix whatever part of yourself that is making you sad and angry. Work on that. Every day. A little improvement. Then check back on us with a better story when you are 30.

Title	I can't take this anymore
Author	Apprehensive-Alps279
Upvotes	33
Comments	121
Date	January 3, 2025 3:32 PM UTC (1 year ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MensRights
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/MensRights/comments/1hsp2kx/i_cant_take_this_anymore/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MensRights/i-cant-take-this-anymore.1540275 https://theredarchive.com/post/1540275

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