Hey. So I am a 24 year old man, decent looks according to people around me and 6+ feet tall. I'm a liberal-leaning leftist in my political/social thoughts, although in the last few months I've had to accept a few "red pill" truths wrt dating. I was a massive introvert for like the first 20 years of my life, gifted schools and stuff (waste of time). In the last year 2-3 years I have massively improved my social skills and I think I am at a good level now, I have a good number of friends (both male and female) and I can have good chats with strangers and very low fear of speaking in public.

But I have had a really shitty time dating in the last couple years. Other than a few funny cases where like the girl turned out to be a lesbian after talking for a while, or that she has had a boyfriend for over year, it's the same script over and over.

I meet someone either on a dating app or in person (university mostly), after the awkward first couple of days a chemistry starts to form, she opens up and there's hope. Then there's the waiting for the shoe to drop.

Either we plan a date and she enthusiastically says yes (a couple times even she suggest the spot) and everything's good, until the day where I'm on the way to the date and I get the "sorry I got anxious" "sorry I don't feel good" text. Or we go on a couple dates and then the girl starts becoming indecisive and unsure about further dates and things die all of a sudden. I can always empathize and there's a million different ways to deal with the issue and progress but they're never responsive to it.

I even had a girl in university than I knew for a few months, we went on a couple dates and we were talking all the time. Once she called me her "hero" because I helped her out of a tough situation. Two weeks after that she stopped responding and her final answer was "I can't do this I'd be a shitty girlfriend".

It almost always comes down to insecurity and fear of future. Which I understand, I can empathize. Everyone gets insecure, I've always had issues with it, but the way women suddenly shut down overnight just baffles me. It's like talking to a wall. No amount of consideration or alternate softer propositions like "ok let's take it slow" changes their mind. I am curious to know more from the women here who have probably had similar situations, of why this happens? Why does it manifest itself so suddenly and not gradually during the times you're talking and going on the initial dates, like what changes from the night before the date and the morning you wake up? And why is it so binary that nothing will change your mind afterwards?