Social proof backfired!

4scentsin1day · 2025-03-31T05:02:15+00:00

Dude. It sounds as if you’ve been told that as a cold hard proven fact with 100% success rate that “social proof” will raise interest levels.

That’s not true, sure it may work with certain (majority) of women, but not all and always.

Women being women it could also be that they are putting on this “cold shoulder” as an act to cover up their perceived interest.

You’ve over analysed the wrong points here. “Social proof” does not literally equal women dropping their panties in front of you and begging for attention.

Short answer, your social proof has NOT backfired on you at all. Back to what I mentioned above, they may even be jealous and feel that they are no match for this new girl you have

Fantastic-Life-2024 · 2025-03-31T12:22:57+00:00

Major L to bring apples to the orchard.

omega_is · 2025-03-31T05:01:34+00:00

You made them feel ugly! Very unseductive to say the least lol. Make them feel beautiful again Romeo.

My_Brain_Hates_Me · 2025-03-31T11:56:02+00:00

I would never have taken a woman I was dating into that group. You shot yourself down. If things don't work out with your current interest, you most likely won't be able to date from the group.

FlexViper · 2025-03-31T19:14:42+00:00

They're probably pissed that all of those hints they gave you only for it to go down in vain so they give you the cold shoulder girls and people in general are Petty too.

From my experience it Feels like Social proof only works if you're some one new being introduced into the group but already taken so some are excited to be with you once you're single it may not worked if you're already in the group for a few months and all of them had attempted to hit on you once or twice only to see you go out with someone else

FriendlyWrenChilling · 2025-03-31T13:57:25+00:00

I think you came off as a braggart, showing off your new girlfriend as some sort of material prize, so the women in your social circle now don't want to be your next conquest. You've basically illicited ASD. See my post on calibration (general not microcalibration).

unevendopamine2 · 2025-04-01T00:18:08+00:00

I think they can tell you brought her to show off

[deleted] · 2025-03-31T09:42:32+00:00

Correlation is not causation my friend. It's likely something else that happened that cause the cold responces ans stuff.

South-Ad-9635 · 2025-03-31T12:23:45+00:00

Question: are you still bringing the foreign woman to group events?

Purple_Advantage9398 · 2025-03-31T20:20:36+00:00

Speed Bumps Ahead

Ok_Jackfruit5164 · 2025-04-01T00:36:19+00:00

Thanks everyone for the replies!

Here's a little more context:

While I have dated a few women outside of the circle, this was the first time that I had ever brought a girl around to meet them. I didn't want to get involved in the circle because, well, I can be pretty incompetent and didn't want have to deal with embarrassment on a constant basis.

In any case, most of the women are taken or are in committed relationships. It was more like I wanted to show that I was a contender, that I was in the game as it were, not just sitting in the bleachers. Like I said, I had been the chronically single for a long time.

Many of the women have been flirtatious and friendly with me for a while, but most of them were already taken. I took it as while there may have been genuine interest at times, they were probably comfortable with me being single and available. The flirting was probably for fun, just shits and giggles and some validation now and then.

I was hoping that "social proof" would show that I was more in the game and a more interesting person, not necessarily to date around in the circle. Plus, I wanted to see how everyone would react as I knew it was going to be a surprise. I admit, this might have been perceived as little selfish or arrogant of me. But I'll admit, it felt good!

The funny thing is, I'm getting the cold treatment more from the women who are already taken or in committed relationships! This was a little surprising. I thought that I would get invitations for double dates or something, I don't know. But instead, was getting the silent treatment. But that was month's ago and things have mellowed out since then.

As a side note, while some of the women took it negatively apparently most of them did not. I also got a lot of respect from my guy friends which, again, I'll admit felt great!

Finally, my girl is a fit Eastern European knock-out with a charming accent. Whenever we go out, we make heads turn and I'm always catching women staring at us shamelessly, even around their guy friends!

ImpossibleBritches · 2025-03-31T19:37:10+00:00

They noticed that you were (your words) "showing her off" rather than treating her like a human being that you actually like.

Becominghim- · 2025-04-05T19:11:46+00:00

I did the same thing but dug myself out of the proverbial hole. Brought a stunner to the gym to train while that is my “orchard” as one other guy put it. But once I noticed the vibe switched with the other girls, I addressed it head on. I saw one of them in the sauna and causally said “you’ve been acting off ever since I brought [her name] that time, don’t tell me you’re jealous”. With this, even if they were never jealous they’re now on the defensive. You now casually laugh it off and they are in a position of seeking your approval again. Now the weird thing with this is it sparks their competitive instinct and want to prove to you that they’re better than the girl you’re dating. Next thing you know, Pilates ain’t the only time she’s getting stretched out 🎩

Title	Social proof backfired!
Author	Ok_Jackfruit5164
Upvotes	53
Comments	37
Date	March 31, 2025 4:29 AM UTC (1 year ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/1jnv6cf/social_proof_backfired/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/social-proof-backfired.1548179 https://theredarchive.com/post/1548179

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