How do you navigatedating as a single dad?

47omek · 2026-01-04T05:33:23+00:00

I don't. My 50% time with the kids is for them alone with my undivided attention, and a large chunk of the ex's 50% I still end up driving the kids to activities/appointments etc. I've had 6ish month dating deals with a couple women and it just left me completely worn out and spread way too thin to be the kind of dad I want to be and left the women frustrated at the lack of time I could give them and always pushing for more. So not worth it at all for me to just get a little regular ass and I've completely back-burnered the idea. If something falls in my lap I'll play around a little but otherwise won't be devoting a significant amount of time or energy.

outsideofaustin · 2026-01-03T17:29:43+00:00

I learned that there are a lot of women in similar situations. And that we shouldn’t make generalizations that all women want the same thing.

I’ve been seeing a woman who lives a few hours away. We aligned our schedules and we spend our kid free weekends together. Neither of us are interested in playing house, we want to focus on our kids. And when we don’t have the kids, we focus on each other.

Props to you for being an awesome dad - especially while navigating this time in life.

xjeeperx · 2026-01-03T16:53:51+00:00

You’d be surprised, I was single for 3 years. Have been in a relationship for 10 months now with someone who was perfectly fine with every other weekend. She’s met my kid 3-4 times in the last 2 months. But I was very up front from the start that I wasn’t introducing them until I was reasonably sure that she would be around a while because I didn’t want my 4, now 5 year old getting attached to someone only to disappear.

Vollen595 · 2026-01-03T16:50:21+00:00

I’m trying to figure this out as well, only I have full custody of a teenager and no mom in the picture. I have no downtime, I have turned down dates because it’s 100% custody for me with a child hurt badly by her mom. I can’t imagine throwing dating or a girlfriend into the current dynamic I live in. I am still in the rebuilding stage after a 20 year/15 married relationship. I have turned down two setup dates by friends, I don’t have the bandwidth atm. Maybe when my daughter is a bit older I will give it a shot. Last thing she needs to see is dad going out and bringing home hookups.

But yeah I really should get back out there. My divorce was only final 7 months ago, I’m still learning to relax.

jarnock · 2026-01-03T14:58:30+00:00

I try and keep it as separate as possible, kids know the woman I’m dating - they’ve met a few times, but in general don’t let her stay over while I have the kids (I have 50/50). My ex has her new bf that lives with her and my daughter absolutely hates it, based off my daughters conversation with me, I decided to not have the girlfriend stay overnight in general (she stayed over NYE).

kansurr · 2026-01-03T14:35:50+00:00

Based on my experience, you'll find some who care and others who understand. Just be honest and up front with what you're looking for, and filter out those who will not be okay with it. It may also depend on the age range your looking in. I am 40ish, so a lot of people have kids by that age, so a lot of them understand the situation.

If you make an effort when you don't have your kids that will go a long way towards them not getting discouraged when you do.

Also in my experience, the 2nd comment of not wanting something serious, will bother more prospects than kid time

Outside-Jicama-8468 · 2026-01-03T13:43:51+00:00

I put it out there that my kids come first and that I am NOT planning on ever getting married again..

I met someone through work. It was strange cause she was into me for a while but kept distant because I was married. But, when I took my ring off, she noticed and hinted at the fact she was into me.

We talked and I laid those ground rules out. Plus she has a kid and I told her I wouldnt get between her and her kid either. So far, so good, but its still the beginning so who knows.

Podonkeyfkr · 2026-01-03T18:52:05+00:00

Use weeknights and get a babysitter. Do you have any family nearby?

Title	How do you navigatedating as a single dad?
Author	Candidate_Worldly
Upvotes	1
Comments	18
Date	January 3, 2026 1:32 PM UTC (7 months ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/Divorce_Men
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/Divorce_Men/comments/1q2up9v/how_do_you_navigatedating_as_a_single_dad/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/Divorce_Men/how-do-you-navigatedating-as-a-single-dad.1570308 https://theredarchive.com/post/1570308

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