27 years old. Living with mom still. Only child. Sometimes I wish I had an older brother to talk to growing up to have a role model. My dad is red pill himself. I don’t think he’s ever been attached to a woman. I go to talk to him once a in a while about my problems. Idk why I get somewhat invested and attached to women after dating them long term. Then I start seeing their true colors and I get somewhat insecure. I set myself up for a shitty ending every time. I’ve gone thru this shit not once, not twice but like 5 fucking times now. You hear people saying “oh once you get your heart broken once or twice you’ll learn and things will be different” nope I still haven’t learned. My test levels are in the norm. 600 ng/dL. I’m 5’9 about 160. BP 275/S 340/DL 440 lbs
I’m working in plumbing and heating right now. Working 6 days a week. Making about 52,000 a year which is shit here in New York. I can’t move out my moms house and grow as a man.
So this long term relationship was 1+ years. Second day of break up. The same shitty feeling is back Once again. Depressed. Anxiety. Can’t eat. Can’t sleep. Feel like a bitch. Can’t lift right now I’m weak as shit. I picked up smoking cigarettes again. Just need to get myself together and I feel like it takes me way longer than it does to other people going thru similar shit. Does talking to a therapist work or are they going to tell me some shit like. “ oh you need to talk to her about your feelings and how you feel about the relationship”?
To make things worse I requested this whole week off from work. This was before break up. I can always work the week and get my vacation money. I haven’t taken a week off from work in over a year so I thought it would be nice but now I’m not going to be doing shit except thinking. I’d appreciate any advice here. Thanks