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I discovered TRP pretty late in life. I have been married to the smartest, most beautiful woman I've ever met for 18 years and have always wondered how I got so lucky. I read these stories about all of the crazy you guys deal with and wondered how I found this one in 3.5 billion woman.

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I recently had a revelation, when I had brief flashback to when we were first dating. We had broken up and I was in a mess. In standard blue-pill style I was prostrating myself to try to get her back. She always got plenty of attention from men, especially since she was one of the few women in my major in college. Here I was groveling and she was eating it up. Letting me orbit her. Stopping by my apartment all dolled up before going out to the bars. Conspicuously studying with tables full of guys etc.

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Then the shit test came and I passed it so hard, she has been willing to let me be me, and do whatever I need to do to be happy for the last 18 years.

The memory:

During one of my prostrating sessions, I asked her why she wouldn't take me back if she was still in love with me (yeah I was pathetic) and she basically told me that she wanted to hoe around some more (paraphrasing) before getting back into a relationship.

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It took ever ounce of my will to stand up and nope the fuck out of her apartment when she said that. I remember saying something to the effect of 'if that's something you want to pursue, then it was nice knowing you". This was a spontaneous, visceral reaction. One of those things that easily could have gone the other way had I suppressed the disgust I felt for her in that moment.

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I left her place and went back to my apartment. About an hour later, there she was at my door, with tears in her eyes apologizing profusely and sobbing that she didn't mean it. I took her back. Since that precise moment there have been, no shit tests, no jealousy, no manipulation, no crazy, no stalking minimal woman bullshit.

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Sure we fight and have had normal relationship difficulties, but it is nothing like the stories I see here. There will be moments when they will test your mettle. That combination of disgust and jealousy you get when she shit tests you is there for a reason. It evolved to keep you from raising another motherfucker's child thinking it's your own. Don't override it with rationality (well if I can fuck around, why can't she) or fear (what if she leaves and I am alone). Trust it, and stand your ground.