What is a "soft harem"?

steelpuppy · 2014-05-26T11:55:20+00:00

It's just TRP jargon. Probably used to get a rise out of the politically correct crowd amongst being a pretty decent descriptor. I think that the operative word is "soft" since a proper harem wasn't (usually?) shared with other men and there were responsibilities involved on the side of the guy fucking the harem ladies.

pillburt · 2014-05-26T18:20:49+00:00

A soft harem is different from casual sex in that you are up front about seeing other women, and you attempt (and maybe succeed) at keeping a number of women at the same time (verses trolling a bar for strange).

It's a "rotating soft harem" because a number of members mention the turn-over is around 3 months.

Verses a harem which indicates some sort of commitment, this is really just an ongoing causal girlfriendship with multiple girls.

It clearly has a definition between casual sex and harem.

assmunchinator · 2014-05-26T15:19:48+00:00

Seems like a question for /r/asktrp and not much of a discussion for here.

still_very_alive · 2014-05-26T13:13:18+00:00

A descriptor here, by Susan Walsh no less. To answer your other questions, it's mostly the way TRP says it. There probably isn't much difference between a "soft harem" (though I haven't heard that term in a while) and a casual sex life with several FWBs. Other than the fact the person referring to it that way is a redpiller, I guess.

TRPACC · 2014-05-26T13:46:25+00:00

Society is going back to the harem system.

Its "soft" because its not mandated by rule and laws and so blurred only a very astute observer might see it.

Pair bonding and male as provider is breaking down in favour of women moving into roles in corporations and government (working inside systems run by and being provided for by alpha males).

The "soft harem" (i cannot remember the term for it I think I came up with 4 - 5 years ago, I think it was unofficial harem) just means that now a smaller group of men are having sex with a much larger group of women, instead of people pairing off.

jacks1000 · 2014-05-26T19:36:41+00:00

A "soft harem" is men acting like women. There was a TBP troll that called itself BadBoyHarem which I thought was rather clever.

So women have that one guy friend they mutually promise to marry if they both turn 30 and are still single. There's the "friend with benefits" that she sometimes sleeps with. There is the Nice Guy With Good Prospects she might be saving for marriage. Then there is Biff McStudly she orbits hoping to get her 5 minutes of alpha.

So men respond, and just have a circle of girl friends they hook up with, "date" or otherwise carry on with without any expectations of anything long term.

What's the problem? It's not the 1950s anymore, it's not like anyone is marrying as virgins.

myfriendscantknow · 2014-05-26T19:41:45+00:00

So, from the general vibe I'm getting a soft harem is either indistinguishable from or close to a normal casual sex life. This doesn't, to me, resemble a normal harem very much at all. I can't see a reason to call it a harem. It comes off as trying way too hard.

accacaaccaca · 2014-05-26T12:02:07+00:00

Not RP but my interpretation of it was that it was basically multiple friends with benefits but I could be wrong.

asd1100 · 2014-05-26T13:47:18+00:00

How does it differ from just having a casual sex life?

if you are honest and open it doesn't really differ, mainly: the girls know the man will not commit or go exclusive in the foreseable future.

Is it important in any way other than sexual variety?

Yes, it blows expectancy and social bullshit out of the way of actually relating to one another one as selfish, amoral people that only want to enjoy one anothers company in the present without games or mating strategies.

imissedaword · 2014-05-26T15:52:13+00:00

If there is no difference between casual sex and soft harem, does it matter?

Title	What is a "soft harem"?
Author	myfriendscantknow
Upvotes	0
Comments	12
Date	May 26, 2014 10:53 AM UTC (12 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/26ihhh/what_is_a_soft_harem/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/what-is-a-soft-harem.285683 https://theredarchive.com/post/285683

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