Background: two people I know. Boy likes girl; has asked her out to the movies, and she said yes.

Boy is your typical beta, based on some attitudes he holds. I remember once we were discussing a relationship dispute, and his rationale for the advice he gave was, "The girl always comes first" (which got a round of approval from the surrounding women). He's genuinely the most polite, respectful guy I know, but with a heavy touch of naivety.

I see the girl today and ask her what's going on between the two of them. To which she replies, "He's just a really nice guy, so I thought I'd give him a chance".

To which I respond, "Give him a chance? So you're saying he should feel special to be with you?"

She gets defensive, and to summarize, she rationalizes her choice of words (because, "it sounds really bad") with, "I just don't know how so many girls can turn him down - he's like the nicest guy ever! He's pretty much the perfect boyfriend! I just don't ...find him attractive. But I thought I'd give him a chance."

The above passage is near perfect (I'm doing this from memory) - she definitely called him "the perfect boyfriend", but admitted she wasn't attracted to him.

Now, this guy is not bad looking. His face is average, he's tall, and far from fat.

Incidentally, this is one of the girls who cheered him on, when he claimed that one of his philosophies in relationships was, "The girl always comes first".

Want to put a woman on a pedestal? Good for you. But expect nothing more than platonic friendships for a long, long time.