LTR Xmas shit test. Responded too hard?

chauncy_popperstein · 2017-12-23T13:12:38+00:00

You overreacted for sure. You showed emotional weakness when you did.

Also this goes in ASKTRP.

jonib0ni · 2017-12-23T13:45:55+00:00

Why didn't you just text "Sure whatever, have fun!" or something like that?

Your answer was way too emotional and needy in my opinion. If she really did this to upset you, she got exactly what she wanted.

abenomix · 2017-12-23T16:08:43+00:00

You overreacted. I usually respond with one two words to these kind of shit test texts. I would have answered OK then dread. She will not only apologize but will do whatever was initially planned AND will very likely not attempt these shit tests again. Remember: set boundaries, punish bad behavior, reward good behavior, keep frame.

stealthcreeper · 2017-12-23T13:58:12+00:00

You lost your frame, but by her answers what you said was problably right

MattyAnon · 2017-12-23T15:29:02+00:00

Questions about your oneitis go on asktrp.

cashmoney_x · 2017-12-23T13:26:48+00:00

Lol we're all a mess. It's all one big mess.

Brickles09 · 2017-12-23T14:07:27+00:00

“realizes the error of her weak-ass attempts to get a bitch response”

But you actually gave her the beta bitch response she was waiting for. I used to do the same. Women actually hate men that push away rationality and act like their girlfriends would, through emotions.

A situation like that actually happened to me yesterday. My wife decided to go to a particular place to get a document, and I told her that I could take her there. Later, she texts me that she is 30 minutes late, but that we would go anyway. She knows that 30 minutes late is unacceptable because it would completely disrupt all my schedule. I just replied: “We are not going.” Now, if I had replied her like you did, she would probably answer me with another 20 texts and probably go alone, with some co-worker, just to shit test me even more, but I only replied: “we are not going.”, and I couldn’t care less about her reply. She actually liked that, she arrived later and told me: “We can go there after Christmas. No problem.”

Don’t feed their drama, man. Not worth it.

nebder · 2017-12-23T14:52:14+00:00

girls night out by rollo

You freaked out man. Why so much guy drama.

Your description sounds more like an LDR than an LTR.

sssimasnek · 2017-12-23T15:00:40+00:00

"Ok. Merry Christmas"

Thoughts on this response?

plowzedong · 2017-12-23T16:07:28+00:00

It sounds like you are letting your ego take control here. She's obviously sorry, but you don't seem to be satisfied with the degree of her efforts to express it to you. Either cut her off completely and find someone who is more supplicant to you (if that's what you want), or get over yourself and spend Christmas with her.

stompie5 · 2017-12-23T12:47:14+00:00

I don't think it was harsh, just effectively honest. Why maintain the ltr? Personally, I'd just dump her, because she's probably cheating on you already.

Cesare_MA · 2017-12-23T15:49:04+00:00

Your response makes you sound like a pussy who disguises his neediness with some tough guy act.

RedPill_Swinger · 2017-12-23T14:30:18+00:00

Lol you expect women to apologise? Lol again.

I knew a girl who used to make fun of creepy guys coming back to her. Then I dreaded her and she used to call me 30 times a day. This is how much her word was worth and most likely it applies to OP situation as well... Keep dreading her

therealpkg · 2017-12-23T14:50:42+00:00

Like what most said already, pretty severe over-reaction. However, I think frame is easily recoverable with an incomplete response to the tune of "apology accepted, but let's not do this again, do what you want this Christmas." When she inevitably needs clarification about the relative ambiguity, give her none. That's it.

gayfish69420 · 2017-12-23T16:41:00+00:00

you lost frame with that weak-ass response.

PitsAreShit · 2017-12-23T15:33:40+00:00

I like it because it is real and passionate, like Marlon in streetcar.

I wouldn't necessarily dump her, this is a good thing in terms of molding a girl into how you want her to behave. Most guys I see playing everything ultra cool doesn't work as well and often times just comes from a place of fear, fear of confrontation or fear of messing up, whatever. Be real and live in the moment! God job.

smirk_addict · 2017-12-23T14:26:05+00:00

I think scenarios like this depend on you personally. Calling a girl out on her bullshit and stupid games isn’t a bad thing IMO. It sounds like this friend is toxic and this may not have been the first time your girl has tried something like this. Now she knows where you stand and she has to do something to make this right, because as of it right now you don’t even want to see her.

Sometimes for dread to work you need the girl to hamster your behavior. Giving her vague short responses could potentially blow up in your face and sometimes it’s guys just trying to look cool and not as invested which may not help anything. You told her what your boundaries were. I think you did good. It’s easy for some to say you overreacted but I’m seeing this more as a last straw kinda thing with regards to her behavior.

EDIT: I also always have zero tolerance for this shit. Girls who pull stuff like this have always been the worst kind in my dating history. I don’t want to “dread”. They stop that shit or I remove them from my life.

Title	LTR Xmas shit test. Responded too hard?
Author	itsn0tscience
Upvotes	4
Comments	30
Date	December 23, 2017 12:20 PM UTC (8 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/TheRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/TheRedPill/comments/7lod7n/ltr_xmas_shit_test_responded_too_hard/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/TheRedPill/ltr-xmas-shit-test-responded-too-hard.47924 https://theredarchive.com/post/47924

Comments

Questions about your oneitis go on asktrp.