Thanks to all the ladies/posts here that helped me move on from these useless trashbags. I realized that I was lacking at self love and care.

I've been so heavily dependant upon guys to make me happy for some years now. The guys I've been with, always asked for my nudes and I thought it was normal for a guy to ask for them and normal for a female to send them. I've always felt a little gross after sending them, never thought much of it. So I sent my nudes to every guy that I thought I had an emotional connection with.

I have big boobs so they seem to attract guys, and that made me feel bad because it wasn't my brain or my personality that attracted them in the first place.

It was also strange because I had these string of guys yet I felt so lonely and hollow at times and always wondered why was that. I did everything those guys said, sweet-talked them, boosted their ego.

Now that I look back at it all, I realise that I was giving them a part of me everytime I agreed to do something that I didn't want to.

I learnt to say no. I separated myself from all the assholes, I'm purely single now. Doing that hurt me for a day or two because I had no one to compliment me (it's pathetic really). But I can see things more clearly now.

I know some people do question a woman's character if she sends nudes, but I did what I thought was right at the moment and would keep those guys near me.

Now I know I don't really need a dude to make me happy. I've been spending more time with the people who matter the most - my family and friends.

This also made me pick up on my academics and I'm planning to work on myself further. My main goals for this quarantine are to:

  • Learn a language
  • Cook some new dishes
  • Pursue my hobbies
  • Take care of my brain and body

Hope you all beauties put yourself first, before anyone else!! ♥️💕