When men say "let's see where this goes"...

sojourner_truth_ · 2019-10-31T09:18:52+00:00

Men are quick to put us in a box and slap a label on it. Women have to be savvy and translate their words to their true meanings.

"Let's see where things go" means you have been identified as easy meat for this guy and he already plans to dump you after sex. Then he can feel blameless by saying "Hey, I told you I just wanted to see where things go!"

See also:

I'm not looking for anything serious right now.

I just got out of a relationship.

I don't like labels.

You look like a fun girl, or he's looking for fun. Fun= naked time.

Any mention of being open-minded

ino_y · 2019-10-31T06:31:07+00:00

Could be a decent, healthy guy doing the same thing we're (hopefully) doing - getting to know you, building trust, determining if you're of good character and add value to his life.

Could be he's decided he doesn't want to invest in you as marriage potential so he's cooled off.

Could be a line, he actually means "friends for my benefit".

Keep an eye on him. Does he actually want to do friendship building activities and get to know you as a person, or has he benched you for when he's lonely and bored in his spare time.

AverageToHot · 2019-10-31T07:51:28+00:00

A man will never say that to his dream girl. You're unlikely to be her and he will never commit to you.

Deadgirl1888 · 2019-10-31T19:42:31+00:00

Tell him you wait a month to have sex with someone and see his reaction.

Assiral11 · 2019-10-31T09:23:49+00:00

Even if the guy is great, whenever he says something along the lines of "let's see where this goes" or "let's just see what happens" he means the exact opposite. He doesn't want to "see what happens", he wants you to not ask for the things you want from this relationship and to blindly follow him and give him what he wants from you. He wants to waste your time and make you put up with his bullshit while making you feel like there might be more at the end, but he won't give you what you want.

Guys always approach the girls they want with a plan. They already know before they approach her what he wants from her. When his plan is to take you seriously and work towards a committed relationship, he would never say something like "let's just see what happens". He sounds like he doesn't have a plan with you and doesn't take you serious. He might like you and have respect for you, but when a guy wants you and is serious about you he will make that very clear.

sweetbitchvibes · 2019-10-31T07:22:01+00:00

Guys are quick to classify women as marriage material or not. If he isn’t treating you like the former then it doesn’t matter what he says, in his mind you are the latter.

RegardingReddit · 2019-10-31T06:43:48+00:00

Means he wants to have sex with no strings attached so he can bail easily when he finds someone he likes.

soxychamp · 2019-10-31T11:06:31+00:00

I think you just have to take it at face value. It doesn’t necessarily mean he’s not interested or invested, maybe he’s just cautious when looking for relationships (green flag imo)

However, what this means for you:

Don’t prioritize him, don’t commit to him, he’s not your boyfriend. He’s just a friend (his words)

And start focusing on attracting other men (the most important)

From now on, let him come to you not just 100% but 120%. His date propositions has to have value to you (fun, high effort dates) otherwise don’t agree to see him. He’s no different than a friend that you can take or leave.

2019-10-31T11:03:18+00:00

This means that I will waste your time, fuck you if you let me, and then ghost you/leave you for someone I actually fall for.

modernmedusaa · 2019-10-31T09:58:21+00:00

tell them 'lets see how far this cucumber can go up your asshole, I heard men like the anal play....'

fehduhp · 2019-10-31T12:40:02+00:00

If he makes time for me, then I'm willing to get to know him. But I can't even find a guy who puts in basic effort. So I stay single.

harrohamtaro · 2019-10-31T13:57:44+00:00

It depends at what point in the timeline he says this. If you just met and have only been on a couple of dates, it’s pretty fair for him to have some reservations about rushing in. He’s cautiously assessing you, as much as you are assessing him.

But if the both of you have already been intimate, or known each other for some time, drop this scrub. He’s just waffling around and wasting your time.

2019-10-31T11:01:56+00:00

[deleted]

2019-10-31T11:02:36+00:00

I was told this by a man after a month of dating and being intimate. In that case, it was because he had reservations about a relationship but wanted to keep me around for when it was convenient for him.

Title	When men say "let's see where this goes"...
Author	furbabymomma92
Upvotes	26
Comments	19
Date	October 31, 2019 6:12 AM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/dpjhy4/when_men_say_lets_see_where_this_goes/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/when-men-say-lets-see-where-this-goes.695479 https://theredarchive.com/post/695479

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