I am big on birthdays. My husband never had much of a gift giving tradition in his family and gets anxious anytime he's expected to give someone a gift. So this year, I made it simple and told him exactly what I wanted: a little satin robe to put on over my nightgown in chilly evenings or the occasional morning where I don't get dressed right away. At first I said silk, but then realizing how expensive that could be, I said it's okay if it's not real silk but satin polyester instead.

Well I accidentally (I promise!) found out that he got me a bathrobe. Which I already have and don't use much. I appreciate the gesture and can always buy myself what I wanted in a few months after this is in the past. I want to encourage his thought and effort.

Now I would be just fine saying I love it (I'm sure I will) and finding ways to use it all the time. But when he buys something, especially something he's put some thought into, he asks over and over whether I like it, what I like about it, etc. He's very tenacious since he's in sales, and he will definitely pick up on any little look or vibe of disappointment, even when I'm very careful. So how can I graciously accept his gift and make him feel good about what he got me? I'm not looking for ways to fake it, but rather for ways to adjust my attitude to give him the appreciation he deserves for trying to do something nice for me.

Edit: I love all these responses! Yes, I should probably lower my expectations for birthdays in general. I'm a grown woman. My twins were born very close to my birthday, so I care more about theirs than mine now anyway, but it's nice to get a time to be celebrated. That's not something I can force or demand, though. You've given me some good perspectives about the nature of gift giving, and some specific positives toward not getting the exact gift I asked for. I especially like the notion of getting rid of the old robe. I think he'll like that. In the future, if I want something specific, I'll send a link. I think my mistake here was that I wanted his own spin on it (like he picks what color and what brand) but then got it twisted when his own spin wasn't what I expected. I'm glad I accidentally spoiled the surprise so I can soak in these lessons and appreciate his sweet gesture for what it is when the time comes.