If you read my previous posts you will see that I have been dealing with a lot and many people probably would have called it quits for less. I wanted to try counseling first but now I’m not so sure.
A few weeks ago, after she returned from a trip, she began acting strangely. She was overly sexual and wanted to do somethings we have never tried. She also had bruises on her legs that she couldn’t explain.
I began to feel like she was hiding something from me.
At one point she wanted me to take a photo of an outfit she had picked out for her new job so that she could send it to her sister. (She does this all the time). When she gave me her phone I quickly glanced at the past few photos. I saw some photos of her posing inappropriately with a couple random guys.
I kept my knowledge of these photos secret to see if anything else came up.
A few days later she scheduled an appointment with a couples therapist.
This is strange because I have been asking for months for us to try therapy and she has said time and time again that we didn’t need it.
A few days ago I confronted her about the photos and a few other things I have noticed. She denied any wrongdoing but she did say she liked the attention.
My gut still tells me that she is hiding something.
In a few days we have our counseling appointment and now that all this has come out, I don’t know if I even want counseling any more. I’m at a loss.
Thanks for letting me vent a little.
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Same thing happened to me. First session, she said she didn't want to work on the marriage and hoped I would giver her everything for the benefit of the kids. Immediately after the first session she said she's going to the mall to cool off. Was gone until midnight. She continued to go out and was gone all the time. Later found out that she opened a dating website account the same day of our counseling session. From there the rest was history. I didn't find out about the cheating until after our 4th and last counseling session. So I was crushed, not only did she cheat but she was doing it right after our counseling appointments. The ultimate betrayal.
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[+]neeadviceplease1 points [recovered] (1 child) | Copy Link
It’s funny you say that because I told her the exact same thing. You can’t be supported as if you’re married while living your single life. Can’t have the best of both worlds. She actually told me I was being selfish when I told her that. Anyways, two months into the separation and divorce. Eventually things will get better. My biggest problem was denial and it definitely clouded my judgement. Your comment really hit home with me. Thank you!
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good day brother.
firstly I am sorry for the level in english I am French at the base.
I just saw your different post and I realize that you have been in this situation for more than two months, you live with this sword of Damocles (divorce )for two months. I had the chance to grow up at a time when the dissertation was still a compulsory subject in college and philosophy was studied writing now considered too sexist. blessed time.
we studied all the literary currants and all kinds.
then I did social psychology, and became interested in the relations between men and women.
one thing that is well known in the field is the "Resentment-creating episode" of the woman in the process of breaking up. in short, a woman will never leave on a whim, that it will always pass by this stage of creation of Resentment, that you have lived these last months, bringing several times on the tables divorces for various reasons, in even using your children's handicap to get the idea that your heart was dysfunctional, while refusing any proposal to fix the situation, until it is too late. or at least that she's sure she's going to quit you, and yes, she's going to leave you everything is in place.
my mind: Accept this reality, do not try to bring her back, do the best for your children, that they do not become hostages, and for you, because you are the model on which your children and even the children of others will be built. If you allow yourself to be spoiled by this situation and your divorces, which is inevitable, you also partly destroy the future of your children and those who took you for granted.
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