My girlfriend is a feminist and gender studies minor. She is a great person and absolutely not sexist. We agree on many issues such as that sexism against men and women is equally bad and that there is not enough support for men who are victims or rape or domestic abuse, but we often argue about other issues.

One thing we disagree on is the phrase toxic masculinity. I think it's a sexist phrase that should never be used. She says that it's useful to describe a set of internalized gender norms and behaviors and that it's different from words like manspreading and mansplaining that she agrees are both sexist and useless because toxic masculinity refers to norms that are stereotypically internalized by men and not to individual men or men as a group.

I don't know how to respond to that. She is much better at debating than I am but that doesn't mean she is more likely to be right. I don't feel convinced by her arguments, but I don't have any effective counterarguments, so I will probably have to admit defeat unless someone here have any suggestions.