Teasing

Kikuhoshi · 2015-03-13T11:41:47+00:00

My personal standard: if it's not something I would say to him with a straight face and factual tone, it doesn't need to come out of my mouth, period. Using my husband as an example, I'd never discuss his penis size when I'm teasing (it's late and I can't think of anything else right now), but I often call him an "asshole". Why? Because he calls himself that, it's almost a term of endearment, and he gets the biggest shit-eating grin when I do (like he's saying, "What are you gonna do about it? Nothing? Exactly.").

box_cutter_ · 2015-03-13T16:56:27+00:00

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Bakerofpie · 2015-03-13T13:41:19+00:00

This is going to vary greatly from man to man. Husband and I love to tease each other and he has a pretty high tolerance for teasing, but there are limits which kind of needed to be worked out through trial and error. He has some insecurities I didn't know about and if I touch on a sensitive subject he just requests I don't joke about it anymore and the key is I listen. I also try to make things as hyperbolic as possible and make sure it's things I would NEVER say seriously so there's no question as to whether I'm going, e.g. the other day we were showering together and he bumped the little faucet thing and made the water really cold and I said "you giant buffoon! Can't you do anything right!?" Of course I couldn't get it out with a straight face, and usually it's something completely ridiculous like that so I can rarely do it with a straight face.

Iva3442 · 2015-03-13T14:22:53+00:00

It completely depends on the man. Some men like the play and will play back, some men get offended and hurt by it. Pay attention to his cues. And, as in all things, don't dish out anything that you can't take, because men will tease right back.

nomnompuffs · 2015-03-14T02:12:14+00:00

I don't tease people; I just have an amiable personality and I am very laid back (ESTP) and accepting, while being highly articulate. It lets me get along with people without needing to be a nuisance as my "filler" for downtime in interaction.

The reason I think things like "pranks" and "teasing" are stupid is because I don't like to take my friendships and relationships to a zone where there's potentially insensitive stuff being slung around as casual banter. I'm very good at taking a joke, but I don't dish out, because I don't have much stomache for drama, or "innocent fun" that usually eventually leads to somebody "crossing a line" that was invisible and nobody knew about.

That is, my recommendation is: don't "tease". Just say meaningful things to your partner...seems obvious to me, but the "teasing" thing is apparently very popular, so I'll take a seat.

Aine_of_knockaine · 2015-03-14T05:22:03+00:00

The man and I tease each other all the time. Heck, we chase each other around the house. I slap him on the butt and giggle so he gives me a serious look and chases me slapping me on the butt. We get into pillow fights and stuff. All of these are for me playful teasing. Other people might not like this kind of interaction, but I love it and it works for us. We tend to be very physically playful and teasing. If we ever get to a line he is very easily able to stop me and say okay enough it pretty much never gets to that point though.

FemShitLord · 2015-03-13T14:33:53+00:00

I only tease him about things he is good at, because he knows they are things I like about him. I wouldn't tease him about being fat or having little hair (not his case)

It all depends on WHY you want to tease him - is it for pure fun of both, or because you actually want him to do/change something and are trying to communicate it to him?

P1nkSpr1nkles · 2015-03-14T13:11:09+00:00

I never teased my husband while dating and don't do it now. I see it as condescending and I have so much respect for him. 'Playful' is something different in my opinion though, like smacking his butt or tossing a jelly bean at him. He likes that and we laugh.

mrp3anut · 2015-03-13T13:43:11+00:00

Teasing is tricky and depends more on the guy than what you actually say. If it is something he is self conscious about I would avoid it. Typically you are looking for things that most people would think aren't perfect but that he either doesn't really care about or takes some pride in etc.

toastedmale · 2015-03-15T02:43:44+00:00

the difference is gloating vs teasing. Nobody likes gloating. I like teasing though. especially when i like someone. If i can tease her and she can tease me it's a match. Plus you have to be careful about how you tease. Constantly picking at someones BIG insecurities can be damaging for them.

And you have to make sure you are showing you are open to be made fun of back. Remember men are conditioned to not offend women in anyway. Hell there's videos online that say a man saying a girl is beautiful on the street is a form of harrassment.

And just like with anything. Don't make them feel less in front of people they respect.

All this is moot though if the dude is a uptight version of a tumblr feminist with no sense of humor

CharmingChica · 2015-03-15T19:24:04+00:00

These are all great. My first SO and I are still in high school so teasing is big. I try to always insert a compliment into the teasing/flirting. he'll take of his shirt or do manual labor and I'll come cuddle up to him, look around and say hmmm I wonder how many girls are giving me dirty looks right now and I can hear the smile in his voice, also if he's being very direct or cocky but playful I'll lick my lips, giggle and tell him he's so mean or the worst. I also love bragging about him while he's right there, telling him he's going to take over the world one day. Basically I just play off of things he says or does and put a flirty girly and unexpected twist.

box_cutter_ · 2015-03-13T14:21:41+00:00

[permanently deleted]

Title	Teasing
Author	box_cutter_
Upvotes	8
Comments	19
Date	March 13, 2015 10:23 AM UTC (11 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/RedPillWomen
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/RedPillWomen/comments/2ywapo/teasing/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/RedPillWomen/teasing.85243 https://theredarchive.com/post/85243

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