I'm too arrogant-what gives?

enticingasthatmaybe · 2013-12-05T14:29:56+00:00

[permanently deleted]

redpillschool · 2013-12-05T15:01:27+00:00

When you start hearing that you're cocky or too arrogant- it's working. They sense your increased power in the sexual market and want to extinguish it as fast as possible.

Gorgonzola54 · 2013-12-05T14:14:21+00:00

Never change who you are for a woman. Carry on man, you'll be fine.

jmikolash · 2013-12-05T16:00:38+00:00

Yours is a stereotypical coming of age story. I had to deal with something vaguely similar.

The sudden jump in SMV and the subsequent increase in female attention boosted your confidence to the point where its perceived as arrogance.

The funny thing is, the only difference between confidence and arrogance is how much confidence your project outward. A little, when it's needed and you'll be seen as assertive, do it all the time and you'll be seen as arrogant.

The bottom line is the only negative type of arrogance (as in the kind that would actually turn women off) is the one that is unfounded - when you're just posturing, as in you are a fake - it's the incongruence between your attitude and who you are and what you've achieved that turns women off.

If you don't fit in the category I described above, don't mind what women say. As you probably already know, every DHV is shit-tested by women. The more vigurous the testing, the more they care about that trait in particular, and a man who projects confidence is a turn-on. The "I hate that arrogant asshole" falls in the same category, passion (even negative one) is passion nonetheless, which can be turned into sex with minimum amount of charm.

Remember, there is nothing a woman hates more than fake alphas, thats why they hate PUAs, that's why they considers TRP manipulation - because if it didn't come naturally to you through experience and genetics - as in you had to read about it,they deem that you are not worthy of it's benefits, and that is why at a recent poll women said that what they regret most is the men they slept with.

My advice, maintain frame, either shrug it off or agree and amplify, whatever method of beating shit test fits better with your type of game, use it.

ANECDOTE: In a recent hookup, during the text game phase, she tried to reschelduled the meet-up, I replied with "Better yet, we stay in and you cook for me, something special. ". As expected, her next text was a shit test similar to yours : "You're too cocky". My response : "I like veal".

10 minutes later she texted me her home address.

Arrogance is always tested by women because confidence that high can be easily faked.

_whistler · 2013-12-05T13:36:11+00:00

Here's what you don't need to do: believe women when they tell you how they'd like you to act.

Here's what you do need to do: look in the mirror every morning, and assess what you see. Not just your physical appearance; take a look at who you are socially, ethically, primally. Are you cool with that? If that person you see were someone else, would you admire him? If the answer is yes, carry on.

emp_can · 2013-12-05T13:50:00+00:00

No, girls will try to get you to change that features they like. Did any girls approach you when you weren't egotistical, competitive and self-absorbed? I had the same problem, you get a bit of backlash at first from the "new you" but don't change because of what a girl says (they don't know what they want.)

Daddy45 · 2013-12-05T14:26:10+00:00

and a lot of girls were once into me seem to criticise me for this and tell me I'm too egotisical, too competitive and too self-absorbed and never really have time for them and they are genuinely turned off by this.

They say these things, but the opposite is true. They are genuinely turned on by this.

Just smirk, say "sure," and keep doing what you do.

2013-12-05T13:43:36+00:00

Women will wear you down until you're a subservient, dickless wimp, and then they'll get rid of you for being so meager, in spite of the fact that they made you that way.

Who is the leader, you or her? If it's you, then why are you getting bent out of shape over what she says? You should listen to what the facts say, not her. If the fact is that you're constantly failing with women, then yes, you need to re-calibrate, if you're doing just fine with girls, then keep on trucking.

JohnPeel · 2013-12-05T14:41:25+00:00

You sort of have to realise they are saying these things because they don't believe they should be attracted to it (but are). It's just a form of projection, they're being pre-emptively defensive.

trudatness · 2013-12-05T15:32:29+00:00

No. Absolutely not. You don't realize what your SMV is. The girls telling you this do. They want to keep you in check so they will still have access.

What you need to do is pump and dump (or just broom) these girls and then set your sights on hotter pussy.

Play in the league you're meant to play in.

Archwinger · 2013-12-05T16:25:09+00:00

When a woman tells you she doesn't like something about you, unless you're actually hurting her or negatively affecting her life somehow, that, my friend, is a shit test.

Women don't want a man who changes, backs down, or otherwise goes out of his way to please others when confronted with mild verbal criticism. That's what a weak, undesirable, under-confident man would do. When a woman says, "I don't like X about you," that's a test to see if you'll suddenly start apologizing and changing to try to please her. If you back down, that proves to her subconscious that you're just faking attractive qualities like confidence and self-respect instead of actually being attractive.

On the flip-side, however, nobody (woman or man) likes a serious asshole. There's a difference between being confident, a little cocky, a little narcissistic, but still funny and interesting, and just plain being a jerk. If your guy friends like you, while women verbally say they don't but continue to hang with you, you're doing great. If women are actually leaving your presence because you're seriously running them off with jerk behaviors, you don't need to change, per se, but your approach and delivery probably need work.

Invalidity · 2013-12-05T14:33:06+00:00

Sounds to me like a shit test. They want to see how you would react to such a comment. Play it off as a playful tease.

Even if it doesn't seem like it or they try in anyway to reassure you that they are serious, don't take them seriously.

pcadrian · 2013-12-05T15:06:52+00:00

It's funny, I was just watching a video about this last night - and you sound exactly like the guy who asked this question.

PunkJackal · 2013-12-05T16:04:26+00:00

Honestly the best thing to do in those situations is smile, say "damn straight" and get the fuck on with your life. If you are who you WANT to be, that's what counts dude.

90blacktsiawd · 2013-12-05T14:24:44+00:00

I can't answer your question but keep in mind there's a difference between arrogance and confidence.

mordanus · 2013-12-05T18:25:53+00:00

Never pay attention to what a women says. They are full of words and say a lot of stupid shit. Only pay attention to what they do. Most likely what is happening is that they want more of your attention and are trying to hamster you away as being the bad guy.

georgedonnelly · 2013-12-05T18:34:39+00:00

and a lot of girls were once into me seem to criticise me

Sounds like a shit test. Also, consider that those closest to you, those who already know you, will always be those who resist any change in you, especially a positive change.

Listen to that little voice in your head and recognize the self-serving bias of those girls and anyone else who wants to knock you off your path. Continue forward and pay them no mind.

cagethepepper · 2013-12-05T19:14:05+00:00

I gotta tell you something.

There's a guy in my course who sounds like you, let's call him Jake. I personally didn't think he was good looking cuz he has a weird nose but he wasn't ugly either. Like you, he works out a lot and is pretty confident, which can and has been seen as arrogance by me and others.

For years, I kept hearing about how the girls didn't want to date him because he was too "Fratty", or "LAD"-like. When girls talked about who they'd date, they'd specifically say they wouldn't date him.

Then they'd talked about the guys they wanted to fuck in our course. His name came up a lot. In fact, the most.

At the time I didn't get it. Ok, he was fit, but why him? He wasn't the best looking guy. He was the kind who would hump and dump - and that's where it all made sense. Especially after finding TRP.

You're doing good bud, don't worry what they say. Keep going.

aww40 · 2013-12-05T19:55:46+00:00

They wouldn't respond at all if it wasn't working. Like others have said, you're getting shit tested. But more importantly, you set the standard for your life. It is not within their authority or capability to change what you have set in stone.

Whisper · 2013-12-06T21:26:48+00:00

If someone tells you are too arrogant, they are telling you they find you humbling and intimidating.

Why? Because if you sucked and thought you were awesome, then they would first talk about how you suck, and then about your unjustified high self-opinion. If they skip right to the part where you're too arrogant, that means they cannot find something else wrong with you. Which means your arrogance is justified.

Now, sometimes it's good to tone that arrogance, but only for tactical reasons, and when it is tactically appropriate. This is usually when you're dealing with other men of junior status or experience, whom you want to mentor and make allies of.

It's almost never a good idea with women.

Women will love you for the most outrageous acts of self-regard, so long you as don't pussy out and backpedal, qualify your statement, or otherwise hedge your bets.

It's like driving one of those formula one cars that depends on aerodynamic downforce for grip... if you go around a corner at 145 mph, you'll be fine. Take that same corner at 95 mph, and you're gonna die.

2013-12-05T13:48:29+00:00

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FortunateBum · 2013-12-06T00:24:01+00:00

You're being shit tested because they find you attractive.

JustACrosshair_ · 2013-12-06T05:39:15+00:00

Don't back down OP - Better to be too bold than too tender.

Maybe just try to refine yourself in such away that your confidence comes out solely when applicable, and you don't seem like you are making a point to be confident. See if that may be what you are doing. That may sound weird, but think about it.

2013-12-07T04:24:45+00:00

DUDE! I was at a job interview and we were having a conversation. I don't remember the what was said as it was many years ago. Now, the end result of the conversation was my interviewer called me confident. I was the only guy there, there were 4 girls, including the interviewer.

Now, a fatty turned up and said, "OMG! You're so arrogant!" It seems to me women will call a man arrogant for being clear in his intentions and reaching and grabbing what he wants. She wanted me to be all polite and shit, tuck my balls between my legs like the hordes of women have taught the many men to do. That is what she calls gentlemanly, and what I did, was arrogant.

But fuck her. My interviewer came up with and said, "No, he's just being confident. Arrogance is different."

Bottom line, women don't know shit. If arrogance in confidence, then baby, I wear that shit on my sleeve.

Title	I'm too arrogant-what gives?
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	23
Comments	46
Date	December 5, 2013 1:18 PM UTC (12 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/TheRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/TheRedPill/comments/1s5pjt/im_too_arrogantwhat_gives/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/TheRedPill/im-too-arrogant-what-gives.8531 https://theredarchive.com/post/8531

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