In your own words explain what is wrong with the dating marketplace in USA 🇺🇸

gigachud1337 · 2023-10-26T03:09:41+00:00

feminism and misandry

this applies to all western countries btw, possibly more

Windmill_flowers · 2023-10-26T02:29:04+00:00

Because of technology, we have optimized the dating market down the wrong path.

It has let us to have an unrealistic expectation of what we should expect. For men it's porn. For women, it's Disney movies and romance novels.

Combine that with the fact that women have made a lot of progress over the last few decades regarding employment and financial independence.

These two aspects together have created a social dating environment that is at odds with our biological nature.

DoctorWinchester87 · 2023-10-26T11:59:46+00:00

A major blow to dating has been the evaporation of third spaces for in-person mingling for young people. Ever since the boomers came around, teenagers would mingle outside of school because there was really no other way for socialization outside of talking on the telephone. My dad (a boomer) will literally strike up a conversation with anybody and never feels awkward or embarrassed by doing so. People of his generation were pushed to be social and to learn how to interact with others. Our generation is scared to death of interacting with anyone and is so risk averse that we won't take chances with people. It seems that we actively look for reasons to dislike people and write them off as unattractive. I think a lot of this comes from improper social skills and "anxiety". Too many people these days use anxiety as a crutch to never come out of their comfort zone. I have anxiety and I know it's hard, but life can't just be you in your happy place 24/7. This mentality is too prevalent nowadays.

The economic situation and changing social standards have also been a big shake-up for dating. Dating used to be done primarily to find someone you wanted to build a life and family with. It was a vetting process, and while it had mixed results (divorce rates), people were more willing to compromise on looks because other factors were at play. Now it seems like "trophy dating" (for lack of a better term) is slowly becoming the norm - dating and forming relationships with the most attractive partner you can get in order to maximize sexual satisfaction and to show off on social media. Now guys especially are heavily vetted based on their looks, and dating apps have shown this all too well.

I don't have time to get into several other major problems, such as: the disillusionment and loneliness of young men (which many people discredit and write off), the role that hormone birth control and SSRI medications have played in the stifling of women's sex drives, and many more things.

To use some words that are not my own, a line from Green Day's "Jesus of Suburbia" describes this situation very well: "In a land of make believe that don't believe in me." That's how a lot of guys feel trying to navigate life in the 2020s. We were told many lies growing up and now it seems like no one really cares about the rising loneliness epidemic. Mention the "loneliness epidemic" in most subreddits and see how quickly you'll get comments saying "this is tales from the basement" or "this is just incel talk, everyone I know is fine" or "these guys just think they are entitled to a girlfriend, no one is entitled to anything. get a life". Conversation around this topic is routinely shut down by the public at large.

EverVigilant1 · 2023-10-26T13:31:35+00:00

1) Female power. Unfairness to men. In current society, women get everything handed to them for free while men get nothing even after breaking their asses.

Women get a pass for everything; men are blamed for everything.

2) Inability and unwillingness to see and accept the truth: Looks are paramount. Sexual and life success or failure are genetically predetermined. If you're not sexually successful, it's because of your physical appearance and not personality or any other factors.

LoFiPanda14 · 2023-10-26T13:46:28+00:00

Dating apps and social media

DarkAdmirable653 · 2023-10-26T05:20:45+00:00

Women think money = value because they value money in men

Then the average 5 woman works a job and supports herself and thinks she now deserves an 8

ParadoxicalStairs · 2023-10-26T02:35:47+00:00

Something that bothers me is people having too high standards for their ideal partner when they don't meet those standards themselves. They have a skewed perception of their self worth making them think they deserve a partner of that caliber. This is probably why most guys dislike how below average and average looking girls reject them and going after the fabled Chad. What's even worse is that same group of women belittle and insult men in their own looksrange, thinking they are above them. Men are guilty of having unrealistic standards too, but not as much as women I think.

The second thing that bothers me is people ignoring the existence and invalidating the experiences of ugly women. They do exist, and you likely don't notice them in your everyday lives, but they're still there. Men are generally repulsed by them and some women want to pretend they don't exist. They have really poor social skills due to not having any (true) friends and no romantic partners in their lives. Casual sex isn't going to benefit them either because they will likely attract abusers so they stay out of the dating market altogether.

_izual · 2023-10-26T07:39:10+00:00

hypergamy / 80/20 rule

TheHarald16 · 2023-10-26T09:11:19+00:00

Technology. Men and women focuses more on the looks, on those apps. They don't give each other enough time to explore each other.

NotARussianBot1984 · 2023-10-26T14:03:54+00:00

People are bad at regression.

Due to the collapse of religion, rise of dating apps, and short term mindsets, women no longer wait for marriage nor even get married in their 20s! They hop on a dating app, match with Chad, have the time of her life with a hot guy spending money on her, living her hot girl summer with a guy who will never commit.

Then when she sees her friends get married when they all turn 30, she realizes how empty casual sex is, wants a relationship, but also is incapable of regressing her standards in men to the level required to find a guy who will commit to her. When she says she wants a relationship, every Chad dips cuz he can marry a girl in her 20s, and every average Beta who agrees is seen as ugly cuz she spent a decade fucking hot Chads (even tho she's average girl like Beta dude is).

She wants a relationship but is use to a certain lifestyle with a specific quality of man, that her standards aren't allowed to regress, that she just ends up alone.

Morgan Stanley "45% of women between 25-45 will be single and childless". It use to be the average age of marriage was 22! What a change.

What happens next? That's the fun part! Turns out the Catholics with hundreds of years building a functional society had some good points about premarital sex. Too late, cat's out of bag now. There's no going back, just society collapse.

moresleepy1 · 2023-10-26T19:53:01+00:00

Female sexual strategies being promoted through technology and laws. Male sexual strategies being closed off through technology and laws.

Birth control, abortion, child support, marriage, social media /dating apps, welfare, no fault divorce, affirmative action, child custody. All help remove a woman's dependency on a man.

Men don't have the technology : birth control artificial womb

Or the laws : child custody/support, paternity fraud, prostitution.

To support their sexual strategies.

Title	In your own words explain what is wrong with the dating marketplace in USA 🇺🇸
Author	Cold-Pineapple2784
Upvotes	7
Comments	66
Date	October 26, 2023 2:11 AM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/AllPillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/AllPillDebate/comments/17glt6q/in_your_own_words_explain_what_is_wrong_with_the/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/AllPillDebate/in-your-own-words-explain-what-is-wrong-with-the.1236371 https://theredarchive.com/post/1236371

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