We separated in June 2022, I moved out in January, and since then we’ve been sharing time with the kids roughly 50/50. I’m doing great with the kids and started to get compliments on my daughter’s hair, her outfits, etc. from teachers and parents. By contrast my daughter shows up for school disheveled to the point teachers do her hair up in pity. My STBX is fighting 50/50 which is basically the default in my New England state. A G.A.L. was appointed and did visits. I embraced the process and emphasized my desire to co-parent and have a parenting plan. She has avoided any progress and is disgusted with my mere presence at games etc. I found out from my son that after the G.A.L. visit “mommy said she’s going to say she’s a bad mommy because I was acting wild.” I asked her how he was acting wild. “Climbing on the bunk bed and bottle flipping.” In other words, normal kid behavior. I told my son not to worry. The report is due and I expect 50/50, but she wants to extend. Her parents bought her a condo and she’s dressing in new clothes and handbags and going out to brunch with the wine Moms again. She’s on dating apps. She’s got all this support and I have little. I have one relative nearby. Steady income now but uncertain at end of year. Fellow parents in town have chosen her and I get cold stares. A few of them are still friendly. I’m seeing a woman but she’s long distance. Other than my kids I have little network.

I just want this to be over. This is the hardest thing I’ve ever done. How did you guys survive this?