Attorney prep

Positive-Neck-1997 · 2023-09-15T07:40:05+00:00

Maybe, but it depends on what you want as an end game. Just be honest with your attorney.

Having no children should make divorce much easier than most.

Give your attorney a nice summary of your financial situation too.

upvotersfortruth · 2023-09-15T09:30:04+00:00

Prepare a detailed explanation of the timeline of the purchase of the house and how/why it ended up in your mom's and your name. The attorney will basically need to figure out whether any of "your share" of the house is marital property, subject to division.
She's disabled but is she on disability? Is it permanent? What are her chances of earning an income again?
For the tax return, did she file something incorrectly that you need to amend? Forgery is pretty specific and if she had any sort of permission (tacit or otherwise) to sign your name on your behalf, probably not forgery in any meaningful sense.
"Confirmed" cases of mail fraud means what? Convictions? Was she charged? Did she serve time or receive a prison sentence? In any event, all this might do is probably something to damage her credibility on the stand.
Name calling can be "verbal abuse" I guess, but unless it's repeated and really nasty, or you have some sort of diagnosis from a therapist that it's "abuse" - I'd focus less on trying to paint a picture of her as a demon where it won't help you.
Alcohol can be significant if it impairs her, if you can provide specific incidents of impairment or how it consistently impacts her life, that's better.
Prepare your income, assets and expenses numbers.
Prepare your goals and targets, be prepared to explain to your lawyer what kind of person she is in terms of negotiation, problem solving, communication, etc.
Is she going to get a lawyer?

Objective-Fan-5464 · 2023-09-15T15:05:30+00:00

About that stash of evidence you've got—the audio of verbal abuse, the dodgy tax returns, and the mail fraud. Keep that stuff saved and backed up. You never know when you might need it, especially if things get ugly in court. And let's be real, given the stuff you've already been dealing with, "ugly" is kinda the baseline expectation here.

Your credit card situation is a ticking time bomb. If she maxes it out, it's gonna be your credit on the line. I know you're worried that cutting her off will make things "nasty," but honestly, they already sound pretty nasty. Speaking of finances, you better make sure you've got a clear picture of where you stand. Know your assets, know your debts, and for heaven's sake, protect your credit score.

And then there's the house. It's in your name and your mom's, which sounds like a point in your favor. But man, divorce courts do all kinds of mental gymnastics when it comes to property, so don't bank on anything until you've talked it over with a lawyer. The disability angle adds another layer of complication. Since you've been the breadwinner, the court might look at her disability and think, "Hmm, maybe this guy should be paying alimony."

Last but definitely not least, the mail fraud and forgery are huge red flags. Those aren't just divorce issues, they're legal issues. If proven, they could not only land her in hot water but also tip the divorce proceedings in your favor.

Don't forget about your own well-being through all this. It's easy to get so caught up in the drama that you forget to take care of yourself. Lean on friends, maybe see a therapist—whatever helps you keep your sanity.

So yeah, there's a lot to unpack here, and the first step is finding a lawyer who can guide you through this maze. Good luck, man.

Salty-Rutabaga-3329 · 2023-09-16T05:30:12+00:00

Dunno what your mean about things turning nasty. If you're borrowing her mom's car or something like that, and you need it, yeah, taking the credit card away may be bad.

Otherwise, separation ends shared finances in my state.

If you've separated or the divorce has started, and your state is similar, and you're not borrowing her mom's car, you should absolutely close shared accounts and open individual ones.

Ecstatic-Hospital500 · 2023-09-15T19:27:26+00:00

Just had my phone consultation, attorney wants my tax returns and the deed to my house and a few pay stubs

Ecstatic-Hospital500 · 2023-10-06T08:37:46+00:00

Turned the credit card off and I'm going down the list now with a lawyer . Lawyer even broke down a lite version of what I might pay in spousal support and it was less than I pay now .

HedgehogHole · 2023-09-15T20:50:20+00:00

Hiya! Full disclosure I’m a woman so I’m not sure if it’s cool if I comment here or why your post popped up as suggested on my feed other than because I work in family law. If you want, you can feel free to message me—I can give you a basic list of documents to begin prepping for discovery (which will likely be necessary in your case) and how to organize them to minimize your billing charges. Nothing I hate more than when people try to milk a divorce for more than their fair share so I figured I’d take a chance and reach out. Super glad to see you got a consult already!

guy_n_cognito_tu · 2023-09-15T08:58:41+00:00

I mean…..what are you expecting to fight about? How long were you married? Do you have any assets? Hell, you don’t even own a house.

Title	Attorney prep
Author	Ecstatic-Hospital500
Upvotes	6
Comments	14
Date	September 15, 2023 5:56 AM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/Divorce_Men
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/Divorce_Men/comments/16j54pk/attorney_prep/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/Divorce_Men/attorney-prep.1231901 https://theredarchive.com/post/1231901

Comments