Divorce

Great_Chapter_7102 · 2024-08-23T22:28:19+00:00

I think the best you should do is hire a lawyer. She's definitely going to ask for her share of your 401k. You really need to take actions until its too late to do so.

captainchippsixx · 2024-08-23T15:51:09+00:00

Hire a lawyer. You need to know what happens in your state. Way too Much money on the line and if she is like most she will be pissed that you initiated and what more than what’s fair.

Use the house as leverage, don’t just give to her. She is going to want half of everything including your 401k. Don’t telegraph your punches. Us the house to counter to save your 401K.

yosemitesam00 · 2024-08-23T14:08:20+00:00

Assume everything, outside of gifts or inherited items, obtained or earned during the marriage will be split down the middle.

Edit: The percentages of what is split and by how much can be used as bargaining tools. Everything is negotiable until it isn't or has been given to the person in a black robe to decide.

probebeta · 2024-08-25T02:58:58+00:00

Maybe he went to the casino and that's where his cash went? When my ex and I separated she had zero in her account. Not sure discovery is gonna do much other than show where she wasted her money.

mr21vp · 2024-08-23T14:02:22+00:00

Like with any type of negotiations don't put out your best offer in the beginning. Make her think you want half of the house equity even if that means selling it. Her "nesting instincts" will most likely kick in as the case with most women having emotional attachments to their home.

Gradually work your way to an agreement that suits you best. For example it will be an amicable, no fault divorce without using attorneys. She keeps the house and all possessions (furniture, appliances , etc) inside except for your personal items. In exchange you keep your entire 401k and other similar accounts.

If she agrees to this then obviously don't mention the cash you squirreled away. Very smart move and I did the same for years. I think overall you are set up very well and best of luck!

hofner5963 · 2024-08-23T13:34:21+00:00

Why the hell are you just going to leave the house to her?! It’s a shared asset! Talk to a lawyer and don’t give away anything! You’ll thank yourself for not being so generous a year from now.

upvotersfortruth · 2024-08-23T07:34:05+00:00

Generally everything that either of you have accumulated after the marriage is joint, regardless of whose name it’s in. So you may be able to trade your equity in the house for keeping your retirement fund, but that’s how it would work. Don’t give a generous first offer, give a fair or slightly less than fair one and then your generosity can close the deal. Otherwise it’s wasted.

west-rain-shadow · 2024-08-23T07:24:46+00:00

You need to speak with a divorce attorney first. All of your assets will come out during discovery and trying to conceal stuff is never a good plan.

I do have a 401k, but she has not helped in putting any money away for retirement.

Community property state? You might share more assets than you think you do.

Title	Divorce
Author	rbeecroft
Upvotes	3
Comments	11
Date	August 23, 2024 3:32 AM UTC (1 year ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/Divorce_Men
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/Divorce_Men/comments/1ez2w35/divorce/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/Divorce_Men/divorce.1528086 https://theredarchive.com/post/1528086

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