I have good days and bad days, more good than bad lately. Divorce has been final for 6 months.

Tonight is not a good one. I am sitting in my empty house alone, kids are with their mom, looking at everything here and just feeling like ‘who gives a fuck anymore?’ I feel like I spent decades working toward a future and the rug just got pulled out from under my feet. All that work, all the sacrifices… for what? What the fuck is this all even for anymore? The 18 years I was going to spend raising my girls turned into 9 IF they choose to stay with me 50% of the time when they get older. The house I bought, the saving I did, all of it was with what was best for my FAMILY in mind and that shit is gone, blown up. I know there’s more to it all and I need to relearn how to do things for ME again but fuck some nights it’s hard to remember what it’s all for anymore.