Mortgage and deed under both names

Gattsama · 2026-02-01T10:12:34+00:00

CUT & PASTE

The house has two parts. Title and mortgage. Changing the name on the title is as simple as a few forms and fees at the court house. The mortgage however cannot be changed without refinancing.

3 choices: refinance loan, assumption loan or sell the house. If you get a new loan she still has to get her half of the equity. Either you buy her out (cash), an unequal distribution, or roll into spousal support. If you sell the house, again it's a 50/50 spilt or the equity can be use in lieu of some other support.

Under no circumstances do you want to proceed post-divorce with both parties names on the mortgage. It doesn't matter what your divorce decree says, the bank does not really care, your credit ratings affect it, in. The responsibility is still shared if both names are on the mortgage.

You said you don't have the money to buy her out. If you want to keep the house, that means you have to give her extra funds from some other source to balance things 50/50. If you don't want to do that, or can't do that, then the house must be sold.

It doesn't matter what she wants, to some extent it doesn't even matter what you want, if you don't have the ability to remove both parties off the mortgage, buy each other out, or be approved for a new loan; then the house has to be sold and the equity split.

Feisty_Elderberry_96 · 2026-01-28T17:32:41+00:00

CT is a 50/50 state but how far are you in the divorce process? Are lawyers involved, have you had a hearing with a judge yet, etc.

Divorce is a negotiation. Maybe offer her more of the marital asset split, or more of your retirement assets to keep the house.

You could do a cash out refi - split the equity and get a new mortgage in your name alone.

Id say just dont do ANYTHING until a judge says so or your divorce decree js signed by a judge.

According-Designer15 · 2026-01-28T05:26:42+00:00

her wanting to stay on the mortgage and deed while she's out looking for her own house is a trap, she keeps equity and leverage over you while building her new life, and six months from now she can force a sale or demand a buyout when you've already invested in keeping the place, so don't agree to anything that leaves her on both the mortgage and deed unless you're planning to sell, because right now she's positioning herself to have it both ways and you're the one holding all the risk and payments.

Interesting-Visit350 · 2026-01-28T00:27:47+00:00

Similar issues here. We bought the house in 2018, we’ll our second house we bought (sold starter home we were in first), now bigger house and refi/loan didn’t work out due to change in jobs for me at the time. So we are selling and splitting profit down the middle. She couldn’t get a mortgage with her name still attached to our current house. Felt relieved I could move on.

drchex77 · 2026-01-28T00:22:47+00:00

I'm starting a similar situation in NY. Bought our house in Aug 2020 as well and have a 2.625 rate. Selling would likely mean I have to downsize (due to market appreciation) and still pay the same amount (due to higher rates).

I'm hoping that we can agree to a deferred equity split where we agree to sell the house after the kids graduate high school (12 years). I will get a credit for future equity payments off of the 50/50 split. Thankfully my wife wants to keep the kids in their school district and family home - at least for now.

I might have to compensate her a bit more to consider her inability to get another mortgage.

My loan is not assumable so I'm going to need to get lucky and hope the lender gives me some flexibility to take her name off the mortgage. As I'm the sole income it wouldn't change the risk profile of the mortgage.

ImpermanentSelf · 2026-01-28T00:17:31+00:00

You don’t need typical liquidity for a buyout, you can trade retirement assets for it.

gaelorian · 2026-01-28T00:00:03+00:00

It’s really only three options: buy her out (refi/loan or give other $/investments for her share of equity, she buys you out, or sell.

sphynx8888 · 2026-01-27T21:03:30+00:00

If you can't buy her out, you're pretty limited on options. Agree with previous poster, first find out if your mortgage is assumable. Mine was and it cost me 1500$ to process. If it's not, you'll need to refinance which may change how you look at this.

Legitimate-Corgi · 2026-01-27T20:59:24+00:00

Talk to your lender and see if it’s assumable and what’s involved but if neither of you have the liquidity to buy the other one out I expect you’ll have to sell.

Title	Mortgage and deed under both names
Author	ZoostheMoose
Upvotes	9
Comments	11
Date	January 27, 2026 8:54 PM UTC (6 months ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/Divorce_Men
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/Divorce_Men/comments/1qoq9pu/mortgage_and_deed_under_both_names/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/Divorce_Men/mortgage-and-deed-under-both-names.1572096 https://theredarchive.com/post/1572096

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