I (44m) have been married to my wife (33f) for 7 years. Four children. We have had ups and downs and I've been at fault for my fair share but never infidelity. At our lowest point however, my wife reached out to another man (we'll call him Ben) and started an emotional relationship. Caught her when I found letters they wrote to one another and we split for some time. After that we came back together and tried to make things work.

Fast forward a few months and she claimed to be going on a trip with friends. You can see where this was going. I found out through a series of events (seeing the "friend" she was supposed to be on vacation with at a local gas station) that she was in fact on this vacation with Ben. She claimed nothing happened and that it was an opportunity for a "free trip". She was love-bombing me the whole time through text. We reconciled once more.

Another time forward and she is going to visit another mutual friend in a town that let's say is south of our town. I get that feeling again in my gut but chose to trust her. She leaves and returns the next day hours after she said she would. I'm cleaning out the car as I often do and i find several receipts. She is a quick spender so always look at them just to see where the money is going. One in particular catches my attention. A McDonalds order. It's dated the day of her trip, mid-afternoon, her card but in a city the absolute opposite of her supposed destination. In fact, it's a city between ours and the home of her emotional fling, vacation partner. No other reason for her to be on that side of the state and going in that direction. Confront her she said she wasn't there and didn't know what I was talking about but I found a bag with the exact contents and the internet says that the address is only present if you purchase from that particular store.

I feel like I need an exit plan, but I feel like every part of me is dying slowly and I don't have the will to pull the trigger (just a turn of phrase). What to do first? I don't have friends really and I've contacted a veterans homeless service as she previously kicked me out. I'm beyond lost and fading fast. Help.