My wife makes more than I do. Throughout the years, she and her family have been very demanding, and she would call me a leach and many other degrading words. I decided to move from the toxicity and feel like a man again. I make decent money about 80k. She makes 50k more. instead of being grateful for what we have, money has always been an issue. because she wanted me to fully support her lifestyle while she stash her money.

Our state calculates Child support based on the parent's combined income. and even in 50/50 custody, the Custodial Parent parent gets child support, and does not give credit for the time spent with the kids. When It comes to child support, having just visitation or 50/50 Child support is the same amount and I doubt the court will make me the Custodial Parent. And to be fully honest, I am not sure how I can manage two kids while trying to figure out my life and find a place to stay. I am even considering living in the college dorm for some time as I am doing a Ph.D.

I think the kids, also need that stability as they go to school and their school bus drops them by the house. and it will be difficult for me as a man to do 50/50 the first few years until I have a more stable life. I hope you can relate.

At the same time, I don't want to give up my rights and just get a visitation as it will be complicated to change it later and I still want to have the power to be involved in my kid's life, take them to their practice, games, spend the weekend with them and have them few days a week with me.

Is it a hard rule or does usually 50/50 have some flexibility? Can we add a close that I will spend more time with them as they grew? they are 4 and 5 years old now and need their mom more. But, I don't see myself spending 2k in Child support while rebuilding my life and going back to school. I rather not pay it since she makes good money already.

Another thing, we have a home, and I am willing to let her keep my name on the mortgage and pay me slowly so she avoids refinancing with higher interest. not doing it for her but for the kids.

Is there something I can work with her so I pay less CS? or should I be a jerk, force the sale of the house and invest that money in the stock market and just pay child support like a man? without any favor from her?

Also, I believe I am entitled to some "Alimony" but I was shamed by another group for considering that and was told I should look for another job instead of taking Alimony. Any thoughts on that? it's about 30-50k

My last question is if the court gives us 50/50 and I agree with her to let the kids spend more time with her for their stability and school. do you think she might use that to change the Child custody?

My lawyer thinks she could make her pay me child support. but I don't really want to get dirty and fight in court and I am not sure how doable is that. Lawyers tend to overpromise and underdeliver. and might be just more waste of money. I also don't think I can manage full custody.