I think this is one of the hardest things we have to overcome. We have to retrain ourselves to not think or consider our ex wives feelings or needs.

It’s been mentioned on this sub many times that the person we knew, loved and married is no longer here. They’ve become someone else entirely. Even knowing this, it’s extremely hard to just let go of the nature of being a husband. Like a lot of you, I’ve spent so many years and so much time being her provider, her caretaker, her support system, her best friend.

To just let that all go and reverse my mind set is incredibly hard to accept and execute on. I found value and self worth in being a husband and provider. Now I’m forced and trying to shift my focus to myself.

This isn’t a bad thing. Im trying to find the positive in all of this as I think guys often overlook their own needs and growth for those around they love. It’s part of a sacrifice that we were willing to take on as good husbands.

I keep telling myself that even in this god awful situation, I’ll come out a better person. Even if we didn’t expect/want this to happen to our relationships, it is unfortunately happening- we have to accept it and use it for personal growth. It’s the only way we can win.