Spiraling

Original-King-1408 · 2025-01-17T22:34:05+00:00

UpdateMe

Keyrov · 2025-01-17T16:27:40+00:00

Stay focused on moving forward. Day by day. No overthinking. It gets better with time but you have to keep your mind busy in healthy stuff. Workout. Work extra hours and fix your credit. Etc

Commercial-Doubt-612 · 2025-01-17T09:55:15+00:00

Sorry to hear that buddy. It is not easy. You are traumatised by this event. Gotta let her and the past go bro.

Par_then_Bar · 2025-01-17T00:21:00+00:00

I’m 1.5 years removed from discovering her affair. Still love her. Tried to make it work. It doesn’t. You can love her, just love her from a distance.

Odd-Yoghurt1869 · 2025-01-16T19:13:35+00:00

Yessir, divorce is worse than death.

It will take time. Time will heal.

Start listening to man empowering podcasts, lift some fucking weights, get exhausted, become the best you.

Find that fucking champion in you that knows your ex is an IDIOT for choosing her stupid path.

UnimportantOutcome67 · 2025-01-16T18:10:19+00:00

If this is only a couple of weeks old, give yourself a fucking break. You are still deep in the belly of the cow.

It's gonna' suck. Embrace it. Acknowledge the suck, the pain, the despair. Don't try to hide from it or mask it or deny it.

IME you have to get real with the pain, face it honestly, to heal.

Good luck. You got this. You are not alone.

Altruistic-Monk-6209 · 2025-01-16T14:02:52+00:00

Looking at your post history it's only been 15 days?

You can't just turn your feelings off straight away. Go easy on yourself. You will get over it but it won't be linear. You'll have your good and bad days.

RevolutionaryLaw8854 · 2025-01-16T04:08:47+00:00

Co-dependency.

And you don’t “love her.”

Dr. M. Scott Peck, in his book The Road Less Traveled, defines love as:

“The will to extend oneself for the purpose of nurturing one’s own or another’s spiritual growth.”

Key Points of Peck’s Definition: 1. Love is an Action, Not Just a Feeling: Peck emphasizes that love is not merely a feeling or emotion but an act of will and commitment. 2. Extension of Self: Loving someone requires effort, sacrifice, and the willingness to go beyond one’s comfort zone. 3. Focus on Growth: True love aims to foster growth, whether in oneself or in another person, emphasizing spiritual and personal development. 4. Not Codependency or Self-Sacrifice: Peck distinguishes love from unhealthy attachment or self-sacrifice that doesn’t contribute to growth.

His definition highlights love as an intentional, disciplined, and transformative force, rather than a fleeting emotional state.

I’d bet my very sizable paycheck that you don’t have these thoughts about her

Title	Spiraling
Author	Proof-Veterinarian90
Upvotes	22
Comments	17
Date	January 16, 2025 3:57 AM UTC (1 year ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/Divorce_Men
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/Divorce_Men/comments/1i2gczu/spiraling/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/Divorce_Men/spiraling.1541148 https://theredarchive.com/post/1541148

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