I feel like this woman is determined to live her most miserable life - without retreading the entire escapade I think it's reasonable to assume she's having some kind of mental breakdown and she has decided I am the sole cause of her unhappiness.

I really am trying to be the bigger person here and to nurture kindness and compassion while not being taken advantage of, but I just feel like my life force is being drained daily. Even with interactions kept to the absolute minimum:

I ask her anything about 'our' future (i.e. mediation, divorce, etc.) and she responds with sarcasm which edges into anger and then throws it back with 'I've had enough of these conversation(s)'.

If I ask her respectfully/kindly to do something (i.e. would you mind not hanging your wet clothes by the front door) and she tells me I'm playing a control game (calling me a Fking Ct to add to it)

If I set a boundary (i.e. the car is still 'our' car until we settle things, don't book multiple days away without double-checking who is looking after the kids), then she uses it as a weapon to beat me with about me 'nagging'.

If she doesn't meet an agreement (e.g. I'll be home by 18:20 - and an hour later she's nowhere to be seen) and is called out on it, then I'm hounding and pressuring her.

She seems to veer drunkenly between amicable co-parenting into projecting extreme antagonistism, where there is absolutely no good will and every single action I take is assumed to be manipulative, cruel, or with the worst intentions.

It's so draining, one time she's asking me how my day has been, and the next she is accusing me of being a lazy, selfish tyrant. I'm finding myself being rubbed raw and feeling more and more real negative emotions towards her as a result. How do I navigate this?