I fucking hate myself

Ornery_Cheesecake513 · 2026-07-14T05:31:23+00:00

Take a break from drinking and girls and embrace some boredom and maybe some nature and some exercises. It'll bring alot of clarity also be kind to yourself you only have you.

Ok-Abbreviations999 · 2026-07-14T13:13:34+00:00

Just to clarify, are you actually 15 or is your fear of always being seen as a 15 year old? Advice will vary based on the answer.

Also, have you ever considered therapy for yourself?

ThatBitchMalin · 2026-07-14T12:01:05+00:00

What is preventing you from pursuing your goals and ambitions more earnestly? Is there something else you could do, while taking a break from girls and dating? I'm sure you must have hobbies or things you wish to try out? I believe you can turn this around.

HelenHavok · 2026-07-14T13:44:28+00:00

You have a lot of self-loathing right now, which you don't deserve. Trauma, depression, and other mental health issues can lead us to be really self-destructive. When I was in a bad place mentally, my internal self-talk was so much crueler than anything anyone would ever think or say to me. Please, please get some help from a therapist to help you sort through what is real and what is your brain being horrible to you. Many therapists got into the profession because they had fucked up pasts or childhoods they worked through and want to help others do the same. My last guy was a former addict who spent time in jail, got his shit together, and went to school. There was nothing I could say to him that was shocking. He'd either seen it or felt it all before and so I could really open up to him. Get yourself some professional help you can actually talk to to sort through all this shit you're feeling. Think about what kind of person you'd feel best about spilling all this stuff to and then find that therapist. Man or woman? Young or old? Ethnicity? Finding a therapist is like finding the right shoes. Sometimes you have to try a few to find the right fit and style, but the right pair of shoes is everything. Treat it like that.

Marvos79 · 2026-07-14T05:29:00+00:00

Wow. Shots fired at us one-nut-wonders out of nowhere

LucyintheskyM · 2026-07-14T11:32:40+00:00

Betrayal is an unfortunate part of life, my friend. I have been on the receiving end of it for all but one of my relationships, and I understand the pain and angst it can cause. It makes you guarded and scared, which can hurt potential new relationships.

It can be debilitating, but it's up to you how the broken trust will colour tour future relationships. Will you lead it to make you more careful as you go forward, will you be more open to lovers and choose the most honest, or will you close yourself off to avoid pain?

It's up to you, but just recognise that all humans are capable of being shitty, so you don't become jaded against someone who might be your partner.

EdgewaterEnchantress · 2026-07-14T16:14:04+00:00

Therapy might be the only thing that might help. Compulsive self hatred isn’t an easy thing to fix without knowing where the problems and feelings originally come from.

You can’t fix a physical injury without seeing exactly where and how the bone broke or the muscle/ tendon tore. You can’t just “walk off” a broken leg or torn tendon / muscle, so why would your brain be any different?

Ultimately we are the ones who decide how we experience reality so you would benefit from someone walking you through the process and CBT is usually good for people with problematic or counterproductive beliefs.

So yeah, I recommend therapy, then maybe a psychiatrist if it ends up being related to mental illness or possible Neurodivergence.

Apart-Cookie-8984 · 2026-07-14T17:47:26+00:00

Listen to me... you're still mad young. It's not too late to change all that, especially because you're now very self aware. Reading the comments, you said you were 20... you're barely 1/4 of your entire life span, there's always room and time to grow.

Be kinder to yourself too. You said you're spineless... but the fact that you admitted all of this, on the Internet of all places, shows that you are NOT a wimp. You're a lot braver than you think.

CowboyBoats · 2026-07-14T19:32:42+00:00

I try to get them so lukewarmly that a third party might think I have a single testicle.

Testicular cancer survivors like me taking strays! What did I ever do to you lol

Look, being 20 is not easy. By posting here you suggest that you want to be "ex-red-pill" which involves showing compassion to others; I think you should actually start by extending compassion to yourself.

Learning and practicing meditation is something that helped me a lot when I was dealing with those aggressive feelings, that paranoia about "betrayal". There's a really good (very short) book called "The Miracle of Mindfulness" by a monk named Thích Nhất Hạnh; it's a really smart introduction to how to monitor your own mind and start to be more in touch with where those thoughts actually come from and how to train yourself to be more emotionally sturdy.

I look for someone who understands me deeply but yet I cant seem to open up because my stupid mind thinks such insane thoughts about betrayal, I cant open up to anyone in my real life.

Gotta be able to be happy by yourself before you can be happy with another person. Nobody can ride in on a horse and wave a wand and grant you happiness with their magic p***y. If your brain is manufacturing reasons for you to be this angry with yourself, it's most certainly going to sabotage all your relationships with other people until you do the internal work (via therapy and/or meditation ideally both) of growing up more and developing into someone who can practice calm, and practice non-violent communication and compassion for others.

The good news is that by posting here and recognizing that the work needs to be done, you've already taken the first steps of doing this work!

PopularPie1026 · 2026-07-14T22:30:32+00:00

Good for you for figuring this out man. Many men are the apple that once you bite you realise the inner core has rot. No amount of women could validate you because they're only interested in who you're pretending to be. Not who you truly are. Heal the core. Good for you.

Doso777 · 2026-07-28T16:00:39+00:00

Instead of punching yourself and lying spend that time on actually healing the root cause. No, consuming even more red pill content won't fix that.

xvszero · 2026-07-14T11:31:35+00:00

You're 15, you have a lot of growing to do. You can get there.

Forestfreud · 2026-07-14T18:16:32+00:00

Are you 15 now? Being 15 sucks. It won’t be that way forever.

Personal_Dirt3089 · 2026-07-14T18:37:05+00:00

Take a break from partying and alcohol if it is not making you feel fulfilled.

Own_Recognition_1283 · 2026-07-19T01:17:57+00:00

Hi, I think there are many solutions to what you’re going through. I’m sorry you are feeling so miserable. But there is hope.

I have found a lot of success in calming my inner turmoil with attachment based therapy, especially with the Personal Development School, by Thais Gibson. I hope you look into it. She has a huge platform on YouTube and she might have some of the answers you’re looking for.

Thank you for coming to this realization at such a young age. You’re so very young. Your personality is still forming and your brain is extremely neuroplastic right now. You can easily change and become the person you want to be in six months to a year with therapy and a lot of inner work.

Good luck!

Kyrie_VarLee · 2026-08-04T19:52:11+00:00

Find Jesus in the Catholic Church. God alone can fill the void.

OrchidReverie · 2026-07-14T10:48:38+00:00

I thought the same thing when I was that age. Sounds like you need to examine your diet and exercise. These improved in combination will help you. Be a real one and be better.

Title	I fucking hate myself
Author	Miserable-Pea-3238
Upvotes	13
Comments	59
Date	July 14, 2026 5:18 AM UTC (1 month ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/ExRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/exredpill/comments/1uvzdtu/i_fucking_hate_myself/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/ExRedPill/i-fucking-hate-myself.1585001 https://theredarchive.com/post/1585001

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