Is there a possibility that I will naturally recover

LillyPeu2 · 2022-12-22T04:27:40+00:00

This is purely a rhetorical analogy, from a woman, no less, so make of it what you will. But if you're a small sailboat in a calm sea, is there a possibility the wind will pick up and take you to the shore you want to be at? Sure, it's possible. But the chances are higher that you'll end up somewhere else.

Instead, take control of the tiller, tack or jib to where you know you need to be. And when the wind won't help, start paddling to the desired shore. It takes effort to get there, for sure. But it's the desired destination, right? Isn't that destination worth some conscious, directed and vectored effort?

mjornir · 2022-12-22T04:28:18+00:00

You will-but only if you keep putting effort towards healing. Seek happiness for yourself (independent of a relationship, a partner and sex) and focus on growing, learning and failing and in time you’ll find your way again

iostefini · 2022-12-22T09:41:59+00:00

There is definitely that possibility you will recover naturally, and if it's only been a short time then it's worth continuing and trying to build a happy life now. Finding yourself does take time. Some questions that might be helpful to think about are:

What things make me happy now? Is there a way I can do more of them?
What things have made me happy in the past, and is it worth trying some of them again?
What things seem to make other people happy, and am I interested in trying any of them?
What things do I admire in other people? How could I explore those things in my own way?
If I had a happy life in the future, what would I be doing differently?

If it's already been a while but you're still lost, or if you're thinking you'd like some help, therapy is a good option. It's not going to fix everything right away but it can help you set the direction and take some steps forward.

DaftWarror181 · 2022-12-22T06:05:58+00:00

Did you have any passions, hobbies or things you enjoyed doing that you stopped doing after you got pilled? If so, maybe try to pick those back up.

hippy_speed_ball · 2022-12-22T13:27:30+00:00

What do you mean by "naturally"?

What do you mean by "recover"?

If what you mean is, "will I become the person I used to be if I just do nothing and wait?" Then, no, most certainly not.

You can't ever be the person you used to be, that's just how life works. You won't feel like your old self, because you're not him anymore. You've grown and matured even though you had those red pill ideas internalized. So, now that you are ridding yourself of the internalized red pill ideas, you're left with a different maturity level but missing content. This is very common in boys who internalize misogynistic ideas in their teen/tween years and then abandon it sometime later.

So, you're going to become a third self, regardless of what you do. By "third self" I just mean you'll have a feeling of self different then your internalized red pill years or those before it. What this third self is like is being determined right now.

As far as health and happiness goes I think you should be trying to actively shape your new sense of self instead of letting it form "naturally." Really, natural here just means passively, and it won't help that much. Eventually you'll be happier than you are now, but taking an active role could help you be much happier throughout the rest of your life.

Stargazer1919 · 2022-12-22T14:26:11+00:00

This is what happens when young people are told that the only value in life is to find someone else to date.

I'm sorry you're going through this man.

You're going to have to find your own path. No one can or will do it for you properly.

spacewhoeverthatis · 2022-12-22T11:30:40+00:00

Self-love and self-compassion are a starting point. Build from there. Look up Gabor Mate, his stuff might help.

vcreativ · 2022-12-23T16:46:44+00:00

One of the best ways to normalise your attachment patterns and expectation thereof (which is what I'd consider all of this) is to have healthy attachments.

I'd consider the following. Make some friends that you really trust. Then figure out what scares you most about women or approaching women or whatever, and then try to tell them, little by little. The act of speaking about your fears will also normalise them and deepen the attachment at the same time.

This can be difficult. Likely is. And I can't promise you that it'll get you laid, but it'll allow you to experience healthy attachments of which romantic relations are really only an extension of.

I should add, make no mistake, most people are not in healthy attachment situations, regardless of relationship status. Them getting laid doesn't exactly mean they are either better or further developed.

The key is to address the need that led you to RP and the like in the first place, and it seems to me that very much mostly that's attachment style related. And the best way to heal that is through healthy attachments. With yourself and with others. And not one of them needs to be sexual or romantic.

Title	Is there a possibility that I will naturally recover
Author	DefiantLiterature144
Upvotes	16
Comments	18
Date	December 22, 2022 3:59 AM UTC (3 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/ExRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/exredpill/comments/zsbifi/is_there_a_possibility_that_i_will_naturally/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/ExRedPill/is-there-a-possibility-that-i-will-naturally.1144831 https://theredarchive.com/post/1144831

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