What to think about this study?

mikayrodr · 2022-11-10T23:12:50+00:00

It’s a bad faith survey and representation. 441 respondents is not enough to make a sweeping generalization for millions of relationships. At best, this would represent a population of maybe 40,000. Even then… ehhhh. View anything with a sample size that small trying to make sweeping generalizations about a global population with skepticism.

They don’t even break it down by sexuality or age.

Source: I have a statistics degree

avotoastisgreat · 2022-11-11T00:33:51+00:00

As someone who was almost cheated on (I found out, confronted them, and then left them before it could happen), the signs were all there. I chose to ignore them because I was young and naive and thought I could change him. I wouldn't worry about your partner cheating on you if they're genuinely a good person and you have a healthy relationship with open communication. If a person is going to cheat or is cheating, you'll know about it.

Naus1987 · 2022-11-11T04:50:19+00:00

Think of how dumb the average person is, and then imagine half of the world is worse than that.

That should give you an idea of why people cheat.

Even 50/50 isn’t that bad. The secret is not being an idiot, and being able to vet people properly.

A person’s looks doesn’t determine if they’ll cheat, but a person’s personality will. Go for personality first, and looks second.

These things really aren’t coin flips. People are just dumb. It’s like car accidents. If you’re an above average driver, you can easily go your whole life without an accident. But if you read the news, you’d think they happen to everyone.

Statistics are good, but they mostly tell you what you already know, dumb people have more problems than not dumb people.

Aggravating-Grab-241 · 2022-11-10T23:57:39+00:00

I wouldn’t come to any conclusions on the basis of a single survey. But a lot of people of any gender do cheat. The idea of people being with one person for all of life isn’t natural, so it is an inherent human challenge to not cheat. Cheating is still very wrong and immoral though. At least it is less common now than it was in the past. In the 1950s, it was actually accepted and expected for men to cheat on their wives.

KingsVictory19 · 2022-11-10T22:36:00+00:00

It’s best to focus on making your life the best it can be. Whatever that means to you. And settle down once you find someone who you know forsure is going to be GOOD to you. Most people in Gen Z probably have trust issues due to the way things are today. Rightfully so.

Stargazer1919 · 2022-11-10T22:38:11+00:00

Does that number include people in open/non monogamous relationships? If so, then the number of people who have cheated (using the definition you mentioned) would be lower.

There's risks to pretty much everything in life, including relationships. There is zero way to guarantee that whoever you date/marry (man or woman) won't cheat. That's where trust comes in.

If you or anyone wants zero risk, don't date at all.

uniquename1992 · 2022-11-11T23:27:23+00:00

When you said "46.1%" cheated, do you mean 54% of those 441 didn't cheat?

cuz it said, "we surveyed 441 people who admitted to infidelity with their partners". So they only talked to the people who cheated.

geekosopher · 2022-11-12T14:49:06+00:00

First of all, even if the results are correct, that doesn't mean it's a coin flip that you will be cheated on. That would only be true if either everyone was only ever in one monogamous relationship or if everyone did the same stuff every time they were in a monogamous relationship. Neither of these things are true.

Lots of people cheat once at some point and then don't do it again. A 16 year old in their first monogamous relationship might make-out with someone else, then get married at 25 and be faithful to their spouse until death. That person would still be in that 46.1%. A person might be married so someone who cheats on them and cheat back in order to get revenge and end the relationship. They may have never cheated if it weren't for their partner's infidelity. They would also be counted in that 46.1%. A person who goes through a ton of trauma and ends up cheating as a coping mechanism, then gets therapy and stops cheating will also get counted in that 46.1%. On the other end of the spectrum, a husband might be faithful to his first wife until her death, then he might get married a second time and cheat on his second wife a lot. He wouldn't be counted in the 46.1% for most of his life. So if the data was collected before his second marriage, he'd skew the numbers.

It's great if you're a person who has never cheated and never would. Most people aren't that consistent throughout their lives. A lot of people intend to be faithful always, but end up making mistakes. Many of them are able to learn from those mistakes and make a better partner. Many are serial cheaters. You just don't know. Cheating once isn't a guarantee that they'll cheat the next time. Having never cheated in the past isn't a guarantee that you won't cheat in the future.

It's a lot like abstinence as a form of birth control. On the face of it, no one can get pregnant if they haven't had sex (Jane the Virgin scenarios aside), but there is a huge failure rate for those who try to abstain from sex. So much so that people who have a bunch of sex but use birth control, are less likely to get pregnant. Cheating is similar. Avoiding partners who have never cheated sounds like a sound way to avoid being cheated on. But, that can just set you up to be the first person they cheat on (or they could just be lying to you). It actually might be better to be willing to date someone even if they have cheated in the past, as long as the circumstances of the cheating are different than the circumstances between you and this person. Overall, it's just not a good criteria to worry about. You're much better off not worrying about whether someone has been 100% faithful to all of their partners in the past, then screening out people who have been unfaithful once or twice under particular circumstances. Certainly serial cheaters do exist, and are worth avoiding, but a small amount of infidelity at some point doesn't taint a person.

As a note: I've never cheated on an exclusive monogamous partner in 36 years of life. I'm not trying to justify my own behavior. I'm trying to pass on some wisdom about accepting flaws in others.

What to think about this study?

Comments

- focused only on current infidelity, not all time infidelity

Title	What to think about this study?
Author	Many-Leader2788
Upvotes	5
Comments	28
Date	November 10, 2022 10:27 PM UTC (3 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/ExRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/exredpill/comments/yrtq2a/what_to_think_about_this_study/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/ExRedPill/what-to-think-about-this-study.1139074 https://theredarchive.com/post/1139074