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[–]LadyGrimesFDS Disciple73 points74 points75 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
I think with the early exposure of porn and them "pretending" to have sex with thousands of different women, they have been conditioned not to fall in love the way they would normally, so in other words porn has ruined their capability to bond with a real woman. And this is why they will not give up the porn for a real woman either, because they are bonded to the porn.
[–]Unlikely-MarzipanRuthless Strategist28 points29 points30 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Yes, I agree with this 100%. I’ve noticed and heard a huge difference in men and sex over the last ten years or so. Even their lust isn’t the same as it used to be - I remember my partners would lust over me as a whole person. Now men kind of lust at your body, if that makes sense. Like, they don’t get the googly eyed lust/ almost love look anymore about being in awe with a woman. They just get this creepy crawly distant look in their eyes, that your body is just a flesh light to use while they fantasise about porn. It’s weird.
[–]uselesssdataFDS Newbie52 points53 points54 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I've never seen it, personally, but I'm open to the idea that some might feel genuine love. I think many of them just fall in "love" with whatever image of themselves their partner reflects back to them.
[–]Fresh-Presentation76FDS Newbie42 points43 points44 points 5 years ago* (0 children) | Copy Link
There are a lot of men who need therapy and will never get it and probably never actually love a woman. There are also men that are emotionally healthy and can love. I think accepting that you might never find one of those that you also mesh with romantically makes you less likely to suffer.
[–][deleted] 70 points71 points72 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
The men that I’ve dated, even with their flaws, were not like this. I think if you vet them before sex, you’re able to usually avoid situations like this. I’m assuming this is more common with random hookups vs the relationships that FDS advocates. I think men feel love. I have seen men in my life love very deeply. Men can be very loyal and so wonderful, when they want to be. But just remember that even if he loves, that doesn’t guarantee that he will love you in the right way. It doesn’t matter how much he loves you if him “loving” isn’t how you want to be treated.
[–]daisy_0720FDS Disciple15 points16 points17 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
My Dad loves my Mom. He knew she was the woman he wanted to marry from the moment they met. He worked while she was a SAHM, and as soon as he could afford it, bought a second house in her name only because "she deserves something that's hers and I want her to be provided for when I'm gone." The rent for that house goes directly into her bank account and he doesn't see a penny of it. Whenever he sends me photos of the two of them on vacation together, they both look so happy; he's literally grinning from ear to ear. For as long as I can remember, he's always acted like he's lucky to have her and he knows it. So, definitely love I think.
Otherwise? Um...
*crickets*
[–]PinkPetalCdistbeautyFDS Newbie13 points14 points15 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Lol great last question!!!!
[–][deleted] 13 points14 points15 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
They do, definitely. I’ve seen a few absolutely lose it when they couldn’t see their children due to alcoholism, former record etc.
But we honestly go through the same thing in different forms. Let me show you an example.
Some guy you’re in a relationship with. Could be six months, could be a few years. But as he zips up, you review the experience you’ve just had. Maybe you notice many experiences flooding back as you think about spending an X amount of time with this person that probably hits your disk like a drunken dj and it’s not such a good feeling after all. Do you want a lifetime of some guy with holes in his socks and a sheepish smile? You ponder.
Well, that’s how it was for me.
[–]randomgirlimokFDS Apprentice5 points6 points7 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
My ex- husband definitely loved me. But he had addictions
[–][deleted] 3 points4 points5 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Some of them say they're in love but they just love having power and control over you. It's usually an ego thing.
[–]throwaway23004345FDS Newbie8 points9 points10 points 5 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
Men aren’t capable of deep love and compassion the way women are.... they just aren’t built like that
[–]Revy_Ur_EnginesFDS Newbie8 points9 points10 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Their version of love is centered around control and possession.
[–]n0way0ut1FDS Newbie6 points7 points8 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I agree with this
[–]fireforestfairyFDS Newbie4 points5 points6 points 5 years ago* (0 children) | Copy Link
I think some men do. I'm from Hong Kong and I've seen men who give almost all of their income to their wives to keep (and only keep a small proportion of it for their daily expenses). Doubt they would do that if they didn't love their wives.
[–]Karthasis11FDS Newbie3 points4 points5 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
No, I am lucky enough, that my husband really wants to cuddle and hold me after sex. In the beginning I thought that was weird... Brainwashing by media is strong.
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[–]LadyGrimesFDS Disciple73 points74 points75 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]Unlikely-MarzipanRuthless Strategist28 points29 points30 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]uselesssdataFDS Newbie52 points53 points54 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]Fresh-Presentation76FDS Newbie42 points43 points44 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–][deleted] 70 points71 points72 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]daisy_0720FDS Disciple15 points16 points17 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]PinkPetalCdistbeautyFDS Newbie13 points14 points15 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–][deleted] 13 points14 points15 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]randomgirlimokFDS Apprentice5 points6 points7 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–][deleted] 3 points4 points5 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]throwaway23004345FDS Newbie8 points9 points10 points (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]Revy_Ur_EnginesFDS Newbie8 points9 points10 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]n0way0ut1FDS Newbie6 points7 points8 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]fireforestfairyFDS Newbie4 points5 points6 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]Karthasis11FDS Newbie3 points4 points5 points (0 children) | Copy Link